The only way to tell if you love me
by Saffa
Summary: "I love her." Clint said, his love plain on his face. "But does she love me?" Clint has waited long enough, now it is time to find out whether the hawk is meant for the black widow. Whether fate will allow them to be together. Whether love is actually possible or whether it is just a false dream.
1. What does love mean to a heart of steel

**A/N: Hi everyone. Saffa here. This is my second fanfic for BlackHawk and it'll be a multichapter one! This story is about Natasha and Clint struggling with their feelings of love for each other which clashes because they have different views on it. **

**Just for info, the story will range between Clint's POV and Natasha's POV. Clint's POV will be in normal text and Natasha's in italics. It's just to show the difference more clearly. **

**Please enjoy~**

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**Prologue - ****What does love mean to a heart of steel**

**Clint**

Love.

What is the meaning of love? An intense feeling of deep affection? A romantic or sexual attraction to somebody? A burning flame of passion in the core of your heart?

Love is many things to many people. To me, it is an aching sorrow. A burden that promises no relief. It is the one thing that I want but can never have because my belief of love is not the same as the belief the woman I love feels.

Love should be passionate, it should be fulfilling, it should be joyous. As a child, I watched many couples enter Carson's circus, hand in hand, love bursting from their souls. Their faces would watch a tightrope walker and then turn to one another, smiling as if holding each other was a greater miracle than not falling off a centimeter wide rope.

I am not delusional. There is a pure, beautiful love where it's clear that both partners could not risk separation. But that is momentary, a fragment of possible love that is a one chance in a million. Then there is reality. The ground-shaking, heart-breaking truth of shattered love, wrenched hearts and tears enough to fill the Queen's swimming pool.

Love is a beautiful thing. There's no denying that. But there will be no love for me. When you love someone who has a heart of steel, love is the most fragile weapon to break that armor. When you love someone who has a heart of steel, love is a feeble excuse to be with them. When you love someone like that, you should never expect love to be a beautiful thing.

Because that doesn't exist with someone like that.

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**Natasha**

_Love._

_What is the meaning of love. An intense feeling of deep affection? A romantic or sexual attraction to somebody? A burning flame of passion in the core of your heart?_

_Love is many things to many people. To me, it is a weapon. A tool to fool people into submitting before me, to persuade people to give me what I want. It is something I should wield and manipulate. _

_It is not that beautiful, romantic bond between people as cheesy movies always depict. Love is cold, cruel and callous. I have seen how it breaks people. It was the reason my father ran back into a burning building to find my mother, only to succumb to those hungry flames as well, leaving me alone in the cold world. It was reason I was left alone after Alexei supposedly died, despite those countless promises of forever. It is the reason so many people all over the world weep at night. _

_I am not delusional. There is a pure, beautiful love but that exists solely in the hearts of romanticists and movies. Then there is reality. And I live in reality. Clint once asked me if I would ever love anyone, passionately, solely, as if they are the balance to my being. I told him no. That love is for children and I have long left childhood behind. _

_Love is a terrible thing. People weep, people cry, people die just for love. There will be no love for me. I will only 'love' people with a heart of steel to protect myself. When I love with a heart of steel, their love is but a fragile weapon against my armor. When I love with a heart of steel, their love is but a feeble excuse. When I love like that, love will become a cruel and hungry beast. _

_Because there is no such thing as love with someone like me._

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**A/N – Well how was it?**

**Please read and review. Constructive criticisms welcomed to make this story better.  
Over and out- **


	2. Man ponders love but does not show it

**A/N – okay, so this is the actual beginning of the story. It all starts with Clint and a manly chat with the other three very manly guys. And we all know how manly chats go.**

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**Chapter 1 - ****Man ponders love but does not show it**

**Clint**

Clint lounged on a soft in Tony's tower, contemplating love. In one hand he held a wine glass, untouched. He merely swirled the contents around and stared out of the window at the cloudless blue sky.

Footsteps alerted him to the arrival of Tony, but he ignored in considering his reflective mood. He knew it was Tony from the man's fast steps. As if he couldn't get to where he wanted fast enough.

Clint knew everyone by their footsteps. Steve had a balanced, military pace. It was predictable and reassuring. Bruce had heavy footsteps, like there was someone else inside of stomped, literally stomped, as if he was asserting his position as god. Loki kinda tiptoed (putting it nicely of course). This was the god of mischief. He had to know how to slink around. Pepper was fleeting, always running around and cleaning stuff up for Tony. Tony was of course like a fidgety fox, dashing here and there.

And then there was Natasha. She had silent footsteps which made Clint strain his ears. More than on one occasion she had surprised him by sneaking up unnoticed. Her steps were certain and confident. He wondered how he walked.

"Yo, Clint." Tony called out, breaking his reverie. "You alive there?"

Clint made a somewhat assenting noise. "Mrph."

"Murph?" Tony asked with a horrified expression. "Who's that? Your new boyfriend?"

"Shut it, Stark." Clint growled.

"Touchy." Tony said lightly. "Have I stepped on a minefield?" He poured himself some wine and strode over with those ever twitchy feet to where Clint was sprawled. He looked over the man, noting his pensive mood and disagreeable expression. "What's up?"

"Nothing." Clint shook his head. After years of being a SHIELD agent, he had learned to keep emotions under control and out of other's businesses.

"Nothing my ass." Tony flopped down onto the armchair next to Clint and took a generous gulp of the wine. "Speak, bird brain or I will have to invent something that speaks on your behalf."

Clint looked disturbed at the notion of an invention doing such things.

"What?" Tony complained. "It's possible. I'd just have to hook something to your brain that reads the nerve impulses sent from the brain and then translate it into human words. Simple, right?"

Clint shook his head. "I'll politely decline that idea."

"Spoilsport."

Tony leaned back into the plush and stared at Clint for a while longer. They hadn't been together for long since Loki's invasion, but the man was observant and knew when something was bothering the archer.

"I'll bite." Tony said, curiosity getting the better of him always. "Tell me what's going on."

"Nah-" Clint began.

"Do you want me to toss my wine on your head? Because if I do, I'll get very angry as it's a perfectly criminal waste of alcohol which I will charge you for. Also it'll ruin my white carpet. I'll make you pay for that as well." Tony ranted. "Tell me what's going on. I can help." He adopted a calmer tone.

Clint stared at the billionaire who for once seemed to care about someone other than himself. _Should I?_ he thought for a moment. _Maybe letting it out will help me a little, though I doubt Mr. Genius will make any headway._

He sighed. "Fine. It's about Natasha."

"Ahh." Tony let out a sigh of appreciation. "Now she's a woman who's got it going on. Smarts, athletic and oooooh boy, those curves-" Tony stopped right there as Clint gave him an evil eye. "Okay, okay. What about her?"

"I love her." Clint said plainly.

"Oookay cowboy, down the horse a little." Tony waved at him with one hand. "So you like her. What's the problem?"

"I don't think she likes me the same way." He said morosely.

"Ahhh, I see your problem." Tony nodded. "You love her, but you're not sure if she loves you. Therefore you don't know what to say else it ruins your current relationship."

"That's about it."

"Then it's simple." Said a new voice from the doorway.

Both men looked up as Steve entered the room. "Hey." The tall man said a little belatedly. "Sorry, I overheard."

"Sit down." Tony drawled, offering him his cup of wine to which Steve declined with a raised eyebrow at the half-finished cup. "Simple how?" Tony asked, curiosity plain on his face.

"You ask her outright if she loves you or not."

"Woah, hold it there Captain." Tony said, taken aback a little. "I know you're Mr. Innocent and Pure but love isn't that easy."

"How so?" Steve challenged. "Why isn't it as easy as simple asking?"

"Because-" Tony started but was cut off by Clint.

"Because I can't just ask Natasha if she loves me. She'd smack me hard across the face." He said with a pained expression at the thought. "Love isn't that easy. It makes some people embarrassed, some people angry and some people mislead. It could ruin everything I currently have with her. My relationship as partners."

"But that could last forever." Steve argued. "I lost my forever when I drove that plane into the water. My chance at love was destroyed. It lasted but for a few hours and only because I told Peggy I loved her and she told me the same." He sat with crossed arms and eyes of sadness.

Clint stared at the man who had saved the world but lost his own in the process with awe. "What I'm saying," Steve choked out as if the emotions were getting the better of him. "Is that you should take this chance at love because you never know when you may lose it."

"Really?" came another voice from the doorway. In came Bruce, his glasses off as if he had been polishing them with his shirt. "Sorry, I uh overheard your um heated discussion."

"Come sit doc." Tony invited. "We're all talking about solutions to Barton's love life." He pulled out another cup, went to get the wine bottle and poured a drink for Bruce and Steve.

"You were saying?" Clint pressured the man who sank into the third sofa next to Steve.

"Yes." Bruce said slowly, gathering his thoughts. "I don't think asking straightforwardly about love is always the answer."

"How come?" Steve asked, genuinely interested.

"Because you might just hurt everyone more that way." He said calmly. "I know because my own loves never work out that way."

"Explain." Tony demanded.

"Well. The other guy inside me makes it a little difficult." He shrugged. "If I asked every woman I was interested in to date me, who knows how that would end if I got angry and hulked out."

Clint stared at this man with mutual understanding. Here was a kindred soul who wanted desperately to fall in love and be loved, but couldn't. The only difference was that Clint was limited by himself, but rather by the person he wanted to love.

"Clint." Bruce turned to him. "You're a good man and you know if Natasha loves you or not. You can see it in her."

"What should I do then?" he asked all three men.

Bruce bit his lip and thought for a moment. "In my opinion, I would observe her. See if she shows any signs of interest in her. Go from there."

"And if she doesn't want me." Clint breathed, reluctant to here an answer.

"Then leave." Bruce said plainly watching Clint's eyes widen. "I'm serious. If you love her, but she doesn't love you then it's better for everyone for you to just leave. Leave and try to forget her. Try to find something else to distract you. That's why I became a doctor and tried to help others. To forget about my own predicament and lack of love."

Tony was uncharacteristically quiet. But this was the first time that all four men had shared their hearts so deeply.

Steve leaned forwards. "I still stand by my belief." He said to Clint with a serious expression. "If you love her, you should just tell her and accept whatever comes." Steve put on hand on Clint's shoulder and with a firm grip, he nodded. In that moment, Clint understood everything Steve meant to say even without words. That was his kind of love.

Tony however let out an unidentifiable sound. "Mrgh." He muttered. "I think the best thing for you to do is date another woman and see how she reacts."

"Huh?" the other three men were taken aback. They stared at Tony with suspicion on their faces. "No, no." he said hurriedly. "I mean if you do that, you'll see if she's jealous or if she plain doesn't care."

"But Nat's got a master poker face." Clint argued.

"Everyone's got a limit." Tony said amicably. "Sooner or later she'll break and you can see the truth."

"There's some logic there." Bruce agreed reluctantly, but Steve had a disapproving look on his face.

"Try it." Tony encouraged, pouring more wine into Clint's untouched cup.

"Okay." Clint said, surprising the other three men.

"Uh, what?" Tony said, a little surprised at the easy agreement.

"I have to try something." He said. "I might as well try this plan then."

Tony let out a loud laugh and slapped Clint on the back, causing him to nearly spill the wine. "Good man."

He held out his wine glass to the other four men. "To Clint." He said. "With hopes that all goes well for you."

Bruce, Steve and Clint smiled. They raised their glasses and tapped Tony's.

"I hope so." Clint smiled softly. "May everything go well."

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**A/N – Okay, chapter 1 done. It's a little slow because I wanted to express everyone's emotions and the next chapter will be similar but it's the woman's feelings this time. **

**Please read and review. I want to write something you'll all enjoy and your comments will do the job! **

**Over and out-**


	3. To fall for love is to commit a sin

**A/N – Okay, here's the second chapter. It's from Natasha's POV and its a little chat about love. Hope people can R&R because I'm hellishly nervous about the reception. Are you enjoying it, finding it boring or too long? **

**Anyway, hope you enjoy what you enjoy. **

**P.S. I am totally making up street names here. Never been to America, so don't judge people!**

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**Chapter 2 -To fall for love is to commit a sin **

**Natasha**

_It was near evening and with nothing urgent to do Natasha chose to walk over to Stark tower where there was always something interesting; ignoring the fact it may be potentially explosive, destructive or life-threatening. She was dressed casually in jeans and a black top. That of course didn't deter a couple of wolf-whistles down fifth avenue which she ignored. _

_At the entrance of Stark towers, she was faced with Jarvis' pleasantly professional voice. "Identification?" he asked. _

"_Agent Romannoff." She said clearly. Jarvis spent but a moment processing the data before the door whirred open and an elevator beckoned her entry. "Thanks Jarvis." She said, more out of habit than pleasantry. _

_The lift, Stark-styled as always, took about five seconds to speed up to the 72__nd__ floor where Stark made his residences. Typically of course since Stark would have died of boredom if god forbid the life took longer than a few seconds to arrive at its destination. _

_As the door opened, Natasha was welcomed with an empty room. Eyes narrowed with suspicion that was a vocational hazard, she asked Jarvis "Where is everyone?"_

"_Ah." Jarvis replied in a cool manner. "Mr. Stark, Mr. Banner, Mr. Rogers and Mr. Barton have departed for a 'manly' dinner - as Mr. Stark puts it - out." _

"_Oh." Natasha uttered, realizing coming here might be futile._

_All of a sudden, a strawberry blonde head popped out from the kitchen, alerted by Jarvis' voice. "Natasha!" cried Pepper with surprise and joy on her face. "What are you doing here?"_

"_Pepper." Natasha smiled with relief. It might not be a lonesome night after all. "I had nothing to do so I came here for some fun."_

"_Well come join us." Pepper motioned with her hand. _

"_Us?"_

"_Me and Jane." Pepper smiled. "We're having a woman's night here, come join." _

_Natasha walked around the corner to find a small lit candle on the kitchen floor and Jane sitting cross-legged in cutoff pants and a soft shirt. _

"_Natasha." She smiled by way of welcome. "Come sit down. We're talking about men right now."_

Men? _Natasha froze. _Not a good subject.

_But Pepper pulled her down. She saw that Pepper was wearing a casual red dress that set off her blonde hair nicely and framed her slim body well. Slightly awkwardly in jeans, Natasha lowered herself down to the floor and noted the snacks spread around them like a picnic feast. _

_Pepper noticed the slight fracture in Natasha's normally stoic expression. "Relax. We're figuring how to make Tony behave and Thor to stop setting things on fire with lightning." _

"_Oh." Natasha paused. "That's a little tricky."_

"_Agreed." Jane nodded, holding an open bag of crisps to Natasha. "But as an understatement."_

"_Buuut…" Pepper smiled an unusual wicked smile. "How about we change the focus of tonight to _you_." She pointed casually at Natasha who widened her eyes and sat up straight._

"_M-me." Natasha gaped. "There's nothing to talk about."_

"_Ah, ah, ah." Pepper teased. "There's always something to talk about with women."_

"_And that something." Jane smiled, catching up with Pepper's game. "Has a name beginning with Clint and ending with Barton." _

_Natasha scooted away from the other two women and shook her head furiously. "No, there's nothing." She denied strongly._

"_Noooothing?" Pepper said with a lingering tone of disbelief. "I've seen the way you look at each other."_

"_Like you have each other's backs." Jane added, crunching another crisp. _

"_That's just us being partners." Natasha stated, slapping her hand on the tiled floor. _

"_Partners." Jane smiled. "Tasty position." She smirked at the sudden horror in Natasha's eyes as she realized she said the wrong thing. _

"_Ah yes, partners is the purrrfect cover for something more." She embellished, putting a faux look of wonder on her face. "And what is that something more?"_

"_Jane!" Natasha groaned. "There's nothing between us. I don't love Clint and-."_

"_But he loves you." Pepper interjected. Silence reigned as Natasha looked at her wide-mouthed. "He does. I've seen the way he looks at you. Like you're the moon in a dark, black sky – the guiding light." _

"_W-what." Natasha spluttered. "There's –"_

_But Jane interrupted her this time. "Don't deny it, Natasha. You're a woman. We see these things. He loves you undeniably." _

"_There's no such thing as love." Natasha retorted. She poured herself a mug of hot chocolate. Something to stop her shaking hands. "Therefore, he can't be in love with me."_

"_Love," Pepper said with an almost reverent smile. "comes in many shapes and forms." She flicked Natasha on the forehead before helping herself to some hot chocolate. "You deny love because you think of it as…a weapon? You've used it too many times for your job and so it's desensitized you. But Clint has a different form of love."_

_Pepper pulled open the bag of marshmallows. "You." She said dropping a large, blue one into her cup. "You need to realize what love is first." She plopped another pink one in. "You love him, I really do think that, but you just don't know what love is." She finished by biting a yellow marshmallow in half and then proffered the pack to Natasha._

"_No." Natasha denied, but took the marshmallows and ate one. "I know what love is. Love is a terrible curse. It hurts people, it blinds people and it kills them too."_

"_No." Jane said and took the marshmallows away from her. "That's what you believe love is. That is how you grew up: with love as the concept of sadness." She shook a finger. "But Clint grew up with the belief that love - a passionate, undeniable connection between people - does exist no matter how bleak the future."_

"_That's what makes him so dreamy." Pepper murmured. Natasha narrowed her eyes and shook her mug a little too violently. "See." Pepper teased. "There you go again. Your body is saying it's jealous. But you just don't realize that."_

"_Am not." Natasha muttered belligerently. "I just…"_

"_You love him." Jane reconfirmed. "You just need to discover that for yourself." _

"_Love is for children." Natasha replied with her constant mantra. _

"_No." Pepper said, draining her mug. "Love is for everyone. Young and old. You need love." She tapped the spot right above Natasha' heart. "You've been alone for so long that it's just taking its time to thaw out." _

"_But everyone falls in love." Jane said. "Someway or somehow." She looked dreamily above. _

"_I won't." Natasha whispered. "It'd be a sin for me to." _

"_Why's that?" Pepper asked. _

"_Because," Natasha finished her hot chocolate morosely. "I don't deserve to have that fairytale love."_

"_Too bad." Jane said, falling backwards and onto a soft pillow. "Because everyone has that fairytale love. You've just got to find it yourself."_

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**A/N – As always, please R&R. I need comments here or else I'm gonna go stir-crazy with worry. **

**Over and out- **


	4. Easy is the descent into hell

**A/N - Okay, so here's where the action really begins. A little bit of an emotional roller coaster as all stories need. **

**Also, thanks to GingerHeit and shaneequa for reviewing! You made my day~**

** Hope this chapter makes the story more interesting.  
**

**With that said, let hell commence. **

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**Chapter 3 - Easy is the descent into hell **

**Clint**

Clint rolled out of bed. He'd been long awake, but chose to lay there and contemplate how to carry out this plan.

"I'm going to do it." He told softly to himself, forcing his resolve out into the open. "But if it fails…I'll leave like Bruce said. Leave and never come back."

With that he gripped his hand into a fist and got ready to find true love…or true heartbreak.

* * *

_SHIELD HQ _

"Maria." Clint called, stopping a woman in a tight-fitted suit and severe bun. She turned around at his voice, immediately alert. "I need a favor."

* * *

**Natasha**

_It was a sunny day. Pity that Natasha had to waste it inside of the SHIELD HQ at Fury's request. She strolled in and changed immediately into her tight-fitting catsuit. Zipping it up, she pulled out her com-card (a Stark invention that was a mini-computer with 3D abilities but luckily no picture of Stark on the back) and noted her meeting time with Fury. She looked at the clock. _Half an hour_, she thought resigning herself to find a way to fill half an hour's worth of time. _

_Strolling outside, she cleared a path of rookies who were determined to stay as far away from the dangerous spy at all costs. Thus she saw Clint almost immediately. _

_He was leaning against the polished marble desk, chatting to someone. The chatting wasn't unusual. It was the leaning. _

_Normally Clint was a man of straight-backed spine and posture. As an archer, he was used to holding a position for hours if need be. For him to be leaning over to talk to someone was…strange. _Perhaps he's talking to someone small_, Natasha reasoned. It was just…awfully…intimate. _

_She walked closer, one soft step at a time. He was talking rather energetically with a woman. _A woman?_ Natasha furrowed her eyebrows. Clint never talked to women unless it was on a mission or for a mission. _The only woman he ever talks to is…me_. She felt a small throb in her chest and tilted her head, uncertain of the feeling._

_No, she was certain it must be for a job. But for him to be talking so excitedly…? She was confused. _

No better way than to confront it_, she thought and advanced to where Clint stood._

"_Clint?" she asked in a quiet voice. But he didn't seem to hear her. He moved one hand animatedly, as if demonstrating with his hand made it clearer. _

"_Clint!" she said, louder this time. He turned, with a half-smile plastered on his face. This was unreal. It was not the same Clint she knew. Clint would not chat up some random woman and then have an exciting talk with her. _

"_Hey Nat." he said so normally she felt weird for thinking something was wrong. "What's up?" _

"_Who you talking to?" Natasha glanced over his shoulder and semi-relaxed as she saw Maria Hill, Fury's right hand woman. _

"_Just Maria." He said with a half-smile on his face. _

Maria?_ Natasha froze. _When did you start using her first name?_ As far as Natasha remembered she'd always been Agent Hill or Ms. Hill if need be. She had never been _Maria_ or something so friendly. _

"_I can see that." She said coldly. _Calm down_, she told herself. It's nothing. Perhaps they found common ground or something normal. Maybe Maria Hill even enjoyed a spot of archery. That always got Clint excited and bothered. _

_But then Natasha looked closer. At the too-wide eyes and too-exposed teeth. Something was up. She leaned closer for a better look, but suddenly her com-card beeped. A sign that it was time for Fury's meeting. _

_With a sigh, Natasha repressed the curiosity to investigate, leaving that for later. "Gotta go Barton." She said with a wave of her hand. For _Maria_, she reserved a curt nod. With that she turned her back and walked towards Fury's office, ignoring the irritating, animated conversation that seemed to start up again._

* * *

**Clint**

"So, how'd you think that went?" Clint asked nervously.

"A good start." Maria answered with a smile. "You really love her, huh?"

"Yeah." Clint said, slightly embarrassed. "But I want to make sure she feels the same way."

"I'm not so sure about the plan," Maria said with some hesitation, but noticing Clint's change in expression, she rectified her mistake by adding "but so far it seems good."

"So…"

"Yeah. Time to start phase 2."

* * *

**Natasha **

_Natasha walked out of Fury's office with a heavy sigh. Today was not her day. Fury had assigned her with observational duties for the rookies – who for the record were pathetically frightened of her (something that had curiously started occurring after she threw a level 2 rookie three times her size down the stair case. In her defense, he had been annoying her) – then there was paperwork for both her and another agent who happened to have an extended mission, AND on top of that there was clinical tests she had to undergo. _

_Just her day. _

_She stalked out into the hallway, bent on finding Clint and making him help her with the paperwork and-_

_Oh, today was definitely not her day. _

"_Oh. My. God." She said slowly. "What the _HELL_ is he doing?" _

_She was staring at a passionate making-out session. There was a lot of lip-locking and murmuring and hands running up and down each other and god knows what other disgustingly romantic things. And the worst part of it all was that the two people involved was THE infamous Maria Hill and Natasha's _partner_ - her normally stoic and reasonable partner - Clint Barton._

_People around them stared. Literally stared. They watched the two ignore the whole world around them, watched them kiss each other for all they were worth. Papers scattered the floor where a young woman was blushing furiously and had dropped her load. Another rookie – a small ginger male – had fainted across the hallway. _

_Natasha stepped over the rookie, hellbent on something violent that would stop this…this…mayhem. She advanced on them, hands fisting and itching to pull out her gun. She didn't know what she'd do. Maybe shoot Maria Hill or maybe shoot Clint or maybe just shoot them both. _

"_CLINT!" she snarled. _

_Around her, eyes widened, people started shaking and then they cleared out pretty fast. Soon enough, the hallway was completely empty apart from the ginger rookie who still lay passed out on the floor. But they weren't too far away. In actual fact, Tony, Bruce and Steve were hidden below a desk. They were cramped and stuffed, like children hidden in a hole too small to fit all the tangled limbs, but they had a clear sight of the make-out scene and the now the furious Black Widow. Luckily, they were also out of sight of said Black Widow. _

_Clint however was still making out with Maria Hill. He was actually in the middle of a French kiss, which Tony had made him practice (but please do not ask who he practiced with). You could practically feel the heat rising in the room. _

"_Clinton Barton!" Natasha repeated, this time using his full name like a weapon. She raised her gun and pointed it at his head. She decided after all that Clint should die first; maybe she'd kill Maria later. _

_He extracted himself slowly - painstakingly slowly - from Maria. He pressed one last, lingering kiss to her lips and then pulled back. Even then, he had his arms wrapped around her narrow frame (which Natasha totally didn't envy). Her lips looked swollen, but she had a serene expression that made Natasha very trigger-happy. _

"_What's up, Nat?" Clint said so casually that Natasha felt like bashing the bottom of her gun into his skull. Maybe he'd lose a few brain cells, but no matter. More like the contents of his brain needs re-juggling anyway. _

"_What's up?" she said very slowly and very deliberately in a no-nonsense tone that promised violence. "What's up?" _

"_Yes." Clint said normally. "Is something wrong? Mission time? Too many rookies. Ah, I know, it's that time of the month."_

"_Clinton Francis Barton." She screamed. Clint winced. He hated his middle name and didn't really want everyone knowing about it. "What's WRONG? The only wrong thing I see here is you!"_

_She was full-on screaming now. Her high-pitched tone made Clint's ears hurt and even Tony winced sympathetically before putting on ear plugs. _

"_What on EARTH are you doing?" Natasha growled._

"_What am I doing?" Clint asked innocently. "Nothing wrong I don't think." _

_He turned to Maria who stood silently. "Have I broken some SHIELD rule?" he asked. "Maybe a past mission. Is that why Nat's so mad? That I've ruined her perfect reputation?" _

_Natasha strode forwards and grabbed Clint by the top of his leather suit. She pulled him close. _

_Steve, hidden below the desk nudged Tony and pulled out his earplugs. "She's stopped screaming and you don't want to miss this bit." He whispered. _

"_I'm mad Clinton because you're freaking making out in the middle of the SHIELD HQ." she spat. _

"_What does that matter to you?" Clint asked in a serious voice. _

"_What?" Natasha was taken aback._

_Clint steeled his gaze and faced her. "I said. What does me making out with somebody else in the middle of SHIELD HQ matter to you?"_

"_W-what does it matter to me?" Natasha stuttered as she suddenly became the focus of attention. "It matters everything to me."_

_Clint looked at her sternly. "I-I mean." She raced to find a logical explanation. "You're disturbing the peace and quiet around here. People can't get their work done. I can't get my work done!"_

"_Why not?"_

"_W-why?" She looked at him defiantly. "Because if no one else is doing their job, then how can I do mine." _

"_So what?" Clint said, squaring his shoulders. "You've always worked alone. You don't need other people."_

"_Ah," she looked around her furiously and came upon a com-card. "Ah, because my next job is to observe the rookies. And look at them." She stated pointed at the ginger rookie on the floor. Clint glared at the rookie who suddenly woke up, muttered an apology and ran away. _

_Below the desk Tony sniggered. "That's what you get for being ginger, rookie." He said gleefully. (reference to Sherlock Holmes and the ginger midget but no offense to other gingers around the world, just this one ginger midget)_

"_Natasha." Clint said, stepping closer and gripping her chin so that she had to look him straight in the eye. "Why do I matter to you?"_

"_What?" _

_Clint repeated himself. "Why do I, Clinton Francis (he winced here) Barton, matter to you Natasha Alianovna Romanoff?" _

_There was no mistaking his words now. _

"_As a partner." Natasha said, refusing to say more about the strange squirming of emotions in her chest that made it hard to breath and strange to speak. _

"_As a partner." Clint repeated. "Nothing more?"_

_His tone was so heartbreaking that it confused Natasha. One moment she missed him, then she was angry with him and now she was…what?_

"_What do you want me to say?" she said desperately. Then she turned tail and ran away, away from the people watching, away from the three men hiding under the table and most of all away from Clint Barton and that detestable Maria Hill. _

_And then, in her office away from prying eyes, she cried._

* * *

**A/N - Okay folks and that's chapter 3 done. Please let me know how you found it! **

**Also...please don't take offense for the ginger midget. I was watching Sherlock Holmes again the other day and when i thought of the rookie, ginger was the first color that came into my mind. **

**Over and out - **


	5. Hearts break everyday

**A/N – Thanks to GingerHeit and shaneequa for reviewing again. You saved my soul from endless worry. **

**Well, this new chapter is exactly as the title says. It's all about hearts breaking into little pieces. It's about learning the meaning of loss. It's about learning that love does exist. **

**On a side note, I was listening to Holding out for A Hero by Ella Mae Bowen towards the end. It suits the situation so much~**

**That's it. Please enjoy~**

* * *

**Chapter 4 - Hearts break everyday **

**Natasha**

_Natasha hid under the table, out of sight of the camera which swiveled overhead. She couldn't help the silvery tears that leaked out or the strange clench of her chest. She had absolutely no idea what to do and how to react. All she knew that this was goddam Clint Barton's fault and he was going to pay. _

_A knock at the glass door brought her out of her reverie. She furiously scrubbed at her face, determined to give whoever was at the door the darkest Black Widow glare ever. _

"_Nat?" came Clint's ever-so-irritatingly-sweet voice. "Nat? I'm sorry." _

"_Sorry?" she spat, angry beyond words. _

"_Can I come in?" he asked, wanting to confront her. But she didn't want to be confronted by him._

"_No." she snapped. "Go away." _

_Of course he didn't. He stood there still as he always was when tracking prey. He felt like a statue to her at times. One of those goddam annoying statues with a mustache and pompous expression that she'd always wanted to shatter. _

"_Why did you do that?" Natasha asked, keeping her voice level. "Why. Why try to humiliate me in front of everyone."_

"_Because I wanted to know your true feelings." Clint said plainly. _

"_True feelings?" Was this the supposedly pure fairytale love Jane had promised? "Tell me Clint, what do you want?" The Black Widow was tired of games. _

_Clint leaned his head forwards and decided everything could just go to hell sans the handbasket and he might as well say it. _

_With a sigh, Clint said it. "I love you."_

* * *

**Clint**

There. He said it. He'd gone ahead with Steve's advice and against his instinct to tell her how he truly felt. But what would she say.

After all, Natasha was the Black Widow. She wasn't predisposed to exposing her feelings – her true feelings – on a daily basis. Even to Clint who had been her long-time mission partner.

"Talk to me, Nat." he said, uncharacteristically short of patience. "What are you thinking?"

There was a long silence as Natasha gathered her thoughts which Clint thought must be pretty scattered. He rested his head against the cool glass and waited with bated breath.

"You love me?" Natasha said slowly, repeating what Clint had said as if in disbelief.

"Yes."

"How can you love me?" she asked. "I'm the Black Widow, a killer, a murderer, an assassin."

"That's who you were." Clint said fiercely. "That who you may seem to be." He slammed a fist into the glass door which reverberated with the force of his anger but did not shatter. "However, to me you have always just been Natasha."

Natasha seemed to digest the information with difficulty. Clint took the opportunity to say his mind. _I've started it,_ he thought_. Might as well see this to the end._

"To me." He said solemnly. "You have always been the most beautiful woman ever. The bravest woman. And the most dangerous one." He chuckled at the end.

And he was greeted with silence.

"Natasha?" he asked carefully, leaning away from the door. "Let me come in."

"No." came a ragged answer. Clint ignored her and strode straight in. He knew where she was immediately and walked round to the table where he found a flash of red. There he squatted, meeting Natasha on eye level. He could see tear trails down her smooth cheeks and burned with shame.

"I'm sorry for hurting you." He apologized seeing it as the priority and that Natasha was refusing to speak. "But I needed to know the truth."

"And are you happy with the results?" she said with a bite in her words.

Clint looked affronted. "Happy that you're upset? Hell no."

Natasha averted her face, staring down at the grey floor. "Why?" she whispered.

Clint paused, waiting for her to continue.

"Why kiss Maria-" she said the name with a hiss as if it were poison. "Hill to prove your point?" She clutched her arms and drew herself inwards, making herself seem smaller.

Clint had a pained expression on his face. "I had to be sure…" he trailed off.

"Sure?" she said with tears in her voice. "All I can be sure of is that you're playing me."

"Playing you?" Clint said horrified. "Never, Nat. I would never want to manipulate you. You know me better than that."

"Then why?" she sobbed. "Why hurt me. In front of everybody. Why go so far as to kiss another woman to see if I would want to kiss you or not?"

"Gods Nat." Clint breathed, running one hand through his short hair. "I had to do something drastic to see your true, your natural, reaction."

"But this isn't like you." She sniffed. "You promised you'd always, always be behind me. That you'd never hurt me like they _all_ did. This isn't you." She said with a protesting tone in her voice.

"I would never purposely hurt you." Clint said torn. "That has never been my intention."

"Then what was your intention!" Natasha cried desperately.

"For you to be jealous!" Clint snarled, tired of the drawn out conversation. Then he froze.

There was silence for the longest time. Clint did not move from his crouched position and Natasha seemed to be making herself breath evenly.

Then she looked up and directly into his eyes and he saw clearly now that she had been faking the emotion.

"I see." She said, her tone cold and professional.

_Dammit._ He hissed in his mind. _I should've known better than to trust an 'emotional' Black Widow. _She'd been digging for information again.

"I see." She repeated in an infuriatingly calm voice. "Jealous. You wanted me to act like one of those high school girls and weep after your departing figure?" Her quiet voice gained a deadly tone.

"No, Nat." Clint moaned, hating the direction this conversation was going in. He matched Natasha's stare and then sighed. "Okay, maybe. I wanted you to be jealous because you never seem to show anything for me." He confessed.

"Jealous." She repeated, practically seething out the word. "I am the Black Widow. I do not get jealous."

"You're human, Nat." Clint reminded her. "And all humans feel emotions. You are no exception."

"Oh yes, I do feel things." Natasha said in a warning tone that Clint should've foreseen. "And I feel nothing but disgust and hatred for you."

Clint's eyes widened in horror and he took a step back. "Really?" he whispered, hardly daring to believe what she was saying but seeing the truth plainly in her eyes.

"Yes." She confirmed. "I hate the way you kissed Maria Hill. I hate the way you tried to set me up. And most of all I hate the way you _thought_ you knew me better than I know myself."

"I'm sorry Nat."

"Sorry doesn't cut it." She snarled. "Leave."

"What?"

"Leave. Get out of my face. Disappear. You need any more synonyms or have you got a fully developed English dictionary in your brain after all?"

Clint stared at her stunned. Natasha had come out from beneath the desk where she had pretended to cry, all in order to make Clint feel guilty. Thing was, it was all Clint's fault. Whatever relationship as partners they had before had been destroyed. _All because I went against instinct and thought she might actually love me. _

It was pathetic the way he was being ordered out. But it was the truth so it took it like a man. "Okay."

Natasha narrowed her eyes as if suspecting there to be some kind of plot.

"I'll leave." Clint closed his eyes, not wanting his last image of Natasha to be an angry one. "You'll never see me again. I promise."

With that, he strode out of the room, into the empty, hushed hallway and away from the woman he loved.

* * *

**Natasha**

_Natasha let out a huge sigh; it was a combination of relief, release and regret. Clint was gone and she could finally sort out her emotions. _

_She had reverted to her old self: the same-old interrogation method by making the enemy think they had the upper hand. That they were in control or in this case, at fault. And they all spilled first some pretty lies, then the even prettier truth. Clint was no exception. _

_So. He loved her. Or at least he thought he loved her. After all love is for children and their pretty little delusions. She was an adult and grounded in reality where love was a weapon. He probably was under the delusion that love casts and where did that get him? Well it got her in a rough spot. Everyone in base would have heard their heated argument and seen him storm off. Rumors would fly by the minute. By now it'd be everywhere from Fury's email to a rookies blog. _

_But she'd made the right decision. She'd found the truth – that he wanted her jealous so he could feel like she loved him – and she'd sent him off scurrying. Of course now she had no idea what to do. _

_Considering Barton's character, he'd probably sulk it off for a few hours, then apologize to everyone, get yelled at by Fury, apologize some more and finally patch things up between the two. He'd learned his lesson and there would be no more future problems. So everything was fine, right?_

_Somehow, her heart told her the opposite._

* * *

_ Fury's Office_

"You understand that once I put this through, it won't be so easy to do the reverse." Fury said, stoic as always. He stood with his back to Clint, staring out at the blue sky.

Clint stood stock-still. "I know. I accept all the terms."

Fury sighed. This wasn't going to be easy. But perhaps it was the best decision to be made in light of recent events. Agent Romanoff would be left alone and therefore more effective, Agent Hill would get on with life and Agent Barton would be somewhere with no distractions and yet still work-worthy. Separation might be what they all needed.

"Understood Agent Barton." Fury turned around to face the archer. "I'll put forwards your request immediately."

* * *

**Natasha **

_Natasha strode into Stark tower. It had been over a week since Clint's so-called love fiasco and she hadn't seen him since. _

_She'd seen plenty of Maria Hill around HQ but she had been normal. Angrily, she had realized that Maria had been in on the gig to 'make Natasha Romanoff jealous' and so Natasha had ignored her outright. Maria, seeing the red-haired agent was in no mood for conversation, had treated her with barest civility and only talked to her about missions when and if required._

_Clint however had pretty much disappeared off HQ radar. _

_Natasha hadn't been worried at first. Fury hadn't given her any team missions and she'd been occupied with paperwork and those infuriating rookies. The upside was that the medical checkup had been postponed because the doctor had been called elsewhere on an emergency. _

_So Natasha had been busy for the past week. But Agent Barton always was at the edge of her consciousness and she wondered where he was and when he would come back, sulking like a little puppy. _

_She knew the archer had some serious patience, but even a week was pushing it. So she'd made her mind up to 'check up' on his whereabouts. She was _definitely _not looking for him out of worry. No, it was out of duty as partners. _

_But she knew something was wrong when she entered Stark towers. The living room was filled with computers. Tony was rushing about with his large floating computer beside him and another hand pointing directions for Jarvis. His face was flushed and his expression harried. Pepper sat on a sofa with another computer in front of her, typing at a furious pace. _

_Natasha walked in softly. Jarvis hadn't even bothered to notify every one of her arrival and that told her enough. She peered at the myriad of computers that surrounded the living room and was surprised to see Bruce fingering another two computers and even Steve doing his best with one of them. Everyone was scanning the computers for something, but what?_

_Natasha grabbed a floating computer and pulled it close. This one showed surveillance cameras of thousands of places. It flickered from an alfresco dining place in Italy to an airport in South America. The pictures barely stayed for more than one second before flickering into another picture. The range of locations were so obscure that Natasha had no clue what on earth was going on. _

"_Tony!" she grabbed the restless man by the shoulders and forced him to stop moving. "What's going on?"_

_He muttered a few words at her and then dismissed her with a hand before returning back to his calculations. _

"_Pepper!" Natasha turned to the strawberry blonde, hoping for more sense. "Tell me something."_

"_Natasha…" the blonde gulped, looking at her with a pale face. _

"_What?"_

"_I'm afraid…" she started but the words seem to stick in her throat. "I'm sorry."_

"_What?"_

_Tony spun around and said the truth bluntly. "Barton's gone._

"_What!" Natasha choked out. She ran to where Tony stood uncharacteristically still. He tapped his computer and brought up the image of a CCTV camera. With a few more taps, the tape played. It was Clint in his room. He had a morose expression on his face and was packing his meager belongings into a red gym bag. Natasha also noted that he was wearing casual clothes: jeans and a zip-up jacket. _

_In other words…_

"_I'm sorry Natasha." Pepper said with tears in her eyes. "Barton's gone and he's not just gone." _

_There was a soft silence as everyone stopped working. Steve looked at her steadily, showing in his eyes that this was the truth. _

_Steve finished what Pepper could not say. _

"_He left of his own accord, Natasha." _

"_No." she gasped and sank down into the plush sofa next to Pepper who placed one trembling hand on her shoulder. "He's my partner."_

_Tony strode over with a computer and showed her another CCTV videofeed. It was Clint, this time in front of a car. It was a forgettable kind of car: black, atypical and boring. He threw his bag in and then got into the driver's seat. And in a rush of dust, he drove off. _

"_That's the last feed we've got of him."_

"_When was this?" Natasha asked, trying to get her facts straight._

"_Four days ago." Tony said matter-of-factly. _

_Natasha calculated. That meant it was about three days after their fight. Enough time for Clint to finish assignments, hand over essential positions and then clear up and leave. And Natasha had been fool enough to believe he would come back to her. _

_She let her head fall into her hands and tried to breath. _

"_There's no denying it." Bruce said, his soft voice trying not to inflict more damage. "Clint Barton is gone." _

_And in her heart, Natasha felt something break._

* * *

**A/N – Okay, so another emotional chapter. Sorry Natasha, not all men are that forgiving. Clint especially of all. The distance means time for each to think, to realize their feelings and perhaps put things into motion. I wanted love to be something treasured, something not always realized but valuable nonetheless. **

**Please R&R. I'd love to hear your opinions!**

**Over and out- **


	6. When love shatters, what is left behind?

**A/N – Sorry for the late update. I was having problems with writing this chapter coz I'd write one conversation then feel it was either too lengthy or too roundabout or basically not giving Natasha's character any justice. But it's done now. So I hope you enjoy this version!**

**Once again, thanks to all the people who reviewed! You don't know how happy I feel to see the reviews coming in~**

**So without further ado, please enjoy~**

* * *

**Chapter 5 - ****When love shatters, what is left behind?**

**Natasha**

_Pepper stood up. She grabbed Natasha by the arm and pulled her rather forcefully into the bedroom she shared with Tony. It was large enough, with a generous view of the city and a widespread bed of blue satin. There, she forced Natasha to sit down on the soft material._

"_Tell me." Pepper said sternly, directly targeting the heart of the problem. "What are you going to do now?"_

"_Me?" Natasha jerked her head up with surprise. "I can't do anything about it." She noticed Pepper's stubborn set of her mouth and continued explaining. "Clint _chose _to leave. If that's his choice then I can't do anything about it."_

_"Really?" Pepper said, sounding unusually scathing. _

_It made Natasha kinda scared though she would never admit that. _

_"Yes." Natasha said firmly. "I'm his partner. Nothing more and nothing less. I don't have the right to intervene in Clint's personal choices."_

"_Bullshit." Natasha was shocked by Pepper's sudden ferocity. Perhaps she'd been drinking. Or perhaps she'd been getting lessons from Tony. Whatever it was, it made Natasha listen. _

"_Natasha Aliavnov Romanoff." Pepper said. "You of all people are the most qualified to intervene with Clint's decision than anyone else in this tower – in this country!"_

"_Why me? What makes me so important?" Natasha seemed bewildered. "All I am is a work partner."_

"_Not to Clint at least." Pepper said matter-of-factly. And that was true, Natasha realized. "Clint loves you. He announced it himself. Which is why your involvement affects all of his decisions." _

"_But if I'm so important, then why did he leave?" Natasha asked in a small voice. _

_Pepper shrugged. "I'm guessing either you said something…or he just couldn't take it." She smiled softly at Natasha stricken face. "I mean…how would you like to be around someone who you love, but know they would never love you back? It would be pure torture." _

_There was silence as Natasha thought back to when she screamed at Clint to leave. _

...

"Sorry doesn't cut it." She snarled. "Leave."

"What?"

"Leave. Get out of my face. Disappear. You need any more synonyms or have you got a fully developed English dictionary in your brain after all?"

...

"_I…told him to go…" Natasha whispered through her fingers. "And he went."_

_Pepper nodded with closed eyes. "Remember what Loki said to you. About when he was controlling Clint."_

"_He said," Natasha remembered. "That he would let Clint kill me painfully, intimately. And then he wake up long enough to watch me die."_

"_Yes." Pepper said. "Because he knew Clint loved you. And that him killing you would not just kill, but shatter Clint as well." _

"_Even then?" Natasha said softly. "Even then did he love me?"_

"_Yes. Even then." Pepper said simply. "Everyone knew it." _

"_Everyone but me." Natasha moaned. She had been a fool. Spy enough to read her opponent's movements and decisions. Spy enough to see how they would attack, how they would defend, how they would die. But she hadn't been spy enough to see through her own partner. Because he had never been an enemy. He had always been her safety. _

"_What should I do?" Natasha asked, lost for what to do. Right now, Pepper seemed her guiding light. But Pepper shrugged now. _

"_It's your decision." Pepper smiled, tapping Natasha right above where her heart is. "Follow your heart." _

"_Pepper!"_

"_You have two paths." Pepper shrugged her slender shoulders. "To follow Clint and make him come back…or to let him embark on whatever fate he has chosen for himself." _

"_H-how do I choose?" Natasha whispered dry mouthed. "I could hurt him both ways."_

"_You listen to your heart." Pepper whispered back to her. "And you tell me if you love him."_

_Natasha jerked backwards angrily. Why did Pepper have to bring up that love stuff again! _

"_Why!" she shouted. "Why must I LOVE him? Why I must I entrust my heart to him like all those other foolish women do."_

"_Because." Pepper said tartly. "Those 'foolish women' as you say are happy. I should know. I am one."_

_Natasha stopped, realizing her mistake. "But I'm not an ordinary woman." She snapped back, her temper rising uncontrollably. "From the first time I killed a man I realized I wouldn't live that fairytale love. Scratch that, from the moment I lost my first love." _

_Pepper stood up and for a second Natasha thought she was angry. But Pepper wasn't. She walked over to the minibar and poured them two cups of coffee. Then she walked back with a thoughtful gaze. Natasha accepted the mug and sipped it quietly. She remained silent as a thousand thoughts streamed through her head. About Clint loving her, about the way Alexi used to love her. _

"_I know what it feels like to watch someone you love walk away." Pepper said suddenly. Natasha froze. _

_"It's simple." the strawberry blonde said with a level voice. "Tony used to be a playboy. The worst kind who slept with a different woman nearly every night. I was his secretary. Nothing more and nothing less." She gave Natasha a sideway grin as she borrowed her words. _

_Pepper picked up her coffee mug and mulled over the cooling contents. "At first I thought it shouldn't matter to me. That this twinge in my chest was just annoyance at his foolery with woman and lack of seriousness."_

_Natasha pursed her lips. Was this _twinge _the same ache she felt in her chest?_

_"Then Tony nearly died." Pepper closed her eyes, as if reliving the horrible moment when a telephone call came at 3 in the morning saying Tony had been kidnapped, then another at 6 in the evening saying Tony had been found but was half-dead. Then another call saying Tony was being poisoned by the very machine that was saving his life and suddenly it was all right so Pepper didn't need to worry anymore. Because OF COURSE now that Tony had figured things out, Pepper shouldn't have a say in anything. _

_"That was when I realized I was in love with Anthony Edward Stark." Pepper smiled with a dreamy curve of her lips. "And so I stepped in, told him off and made myself half in charge of the detestable man." Natasha couldn't help but smile at the way Pepper said the word 'detestable'. Like he was her little boy. _

_"So you realized you loved him. Or maybe all along you loved him." Natasha said. "But I don't love Clint. I don't love anymore."_

"_Don't you get it?" Pepper said softly, wondering how the fiery agent could be so dense when it came to love. "Maybe you've loved him all along." _

_Natasha was stunned into silence. So Pepper continued. "Maybe you love him but you just haven't realized it for yourself. Just like I did. We only realize who we love when we come so close to losing them."_

_"After all…you fell in love once, didn't you?" Pepper said, making Natasha sit up straight and look straight at her with a mixture of shock and anger. _

_"Yes. I know." Pepper looked at her evenly. "I know you were married to Alexi Shostakov. I know he died. And I know you were left heartbroken." _

_Natasha stared at her for the longest of times. She knew that SHIELD probably had all the information about her past even if she hadn't submitted everything to them. That was part of the job description. What she hadn't expected was for Pepper – dear innocent Pepper - to have been privy to all this information as well. _

_"Sorry." Pepper said with a sheepish look. "I look into anything that may affect Tony." _

_Natasha couldn't help but smile at that. Even if it had been an invasion of privacy, it was all for the man she loved. This perhaps is truly what love was. _

_But love had long fled Natasha's heart. _

_"That love I felt for Alexi was a simple childish one. I was child then and love only belongs to children." she repeated her mantra, shielded her heart with steel. "I know better now."_

_"What do you know?"_

_"I know that there is no such thing as love. That love doesn't exist for me."_

"_Really?" Pepper stood up and gave her a fierce glare. "Listen to yourself: I can't love anyone. I don't love anyone. I will grow old and cold with a hole for my heart." _

_Natasha felt her cheeks heat. "What do you know!" she snarled. _

"_What do I know?" Pepper screamed back. "I know what it feels like to love someone you think will always leave you. I know what it feels like to see them slipping away. I know what you risk when you fall in love. What about you?"_

_Natasha took a step back as she was suddenly the target. "I-I…"_

"_Let me tell you this Natasha." Pepper hissed, holding out one hand. "You need to ask yourself if you can live the rest of your life without Clint. If you can turn you back and watch him walk away. If you can devote yourself to loneliness for the rest of eternity." _

_And that was that. Natasha couldn't take it. She threw the bedroom door open and ran out, blindly searching for the staircase to the roof. Because Natasha may be an agent, but she's a woman first._

* * *

"_Come out of there." Pepper commanded, pointing one finger to her wardrobe. _

_The door opened slowly and a guilty face appeared: Tony's. _

"_So…I heard you guys shouting." Tony said swirling the contents of his wine glass. He strode over to where Pepper stood, appearing completely at ease with having just come out of Pepper's lingerie wardrobe. "Have you patched things up yet?"_

"_Not yet." Pepper smiled, lifting his white wine out of his hands and taking a generous sip. "But I've set things in motion."_

_Tony kissed Pepper on the cheek lightly. "You always knew what to do. God, you were always there supporting me even when I didn't know it." _

_Pepper chuckled. "Of course. I had my work cut dealing with you." She pointed towards the large poster of Tony in an Ironman suit that he had plastered on the side of her wardrobe. He told Pepper that he was far too smoking hot to be thrown away. She had rolled her eyes good-naturedly and decided not to tell him the reason she kept it was because she did think he was smoking hot. It would've inflated his ego out of proportions. _

_She looked out of the window then and her eyes grew misty. "But this time, I've done what I can. The rest is up to Natasha."_

* * *

_Natasha burst through the door and for a few seconds stood there panting. She was on Stark's roof. As close of a roof as the tower had. It was good enough for her. There was a black night sky sprinkled with stars and the crisp evening chill that cut through her thin clothes. _

_It was refreshing. _

_It was what Clint had always loved. Being out in the open with the sky above his head and the world beneath his feet. Natasha edged towards the balcony of the roof and looked down at the city below. It was gorgeous. A glittering menagerie of building lights, car lights and street lights. There were people hurrying from one end of the road to another, looking like nothing more than colored dots from this high vantage point. And then there was the noise: the sound of life beating and beeping and bustling. A sign that there was life in this world and it would stay that way. It was a symbol of what they – the Avengers – had protected. _

_It was a symbol of what Clint had loved. It was why Clint was an agent. Because he had told her once if he had another choice he would've opened up a night bar with a darts board as the main attraction. She had giggled when he told her that. He had mock-protested but then explained how a bar was the best place to meet people – the real side of people – and get to know them. How for that one night, everyone could be themselves. Because in a bar, there was no false face. People would meet for one night and the next day go their separate ways. _

_Natasha walked away from the steep edge and had the sudden impulse to lie down. So she did. Lie down the way she and Clint used to do on free nights when Clint felt trapped by SHIELD and wanted some fresh air and freedom. It was what Natasha always did when she wanted reassurance that such a person like her, whose ledger was dripping red, could exist in this world. After all when she looked at the night sky with the thousands of brilliant stars, it made her feel so small and so insignificant that her deeds too felt insignificant. _

_It was their thing. _

_And suddenly Natasha found herself missing Clint. Really, really missing him. It ached in her chest like there was a missing puzzle piece. As if she was incomplete alone. _

_And it hurt. _

_It hurt feeling this way. Feeling as if she was alone. _

_They used to sit back to back when lying on the rooftop made them stiff. And Natasha remembered how Clint's warmth would seep into her, slowly and gently. He never seemed to get cold. He was always her portable heater as she teased him. Whenever she was cold, all she needed was 'one Clint Barton, please'. _

_And now she was cold. Freezing in fact. The chilly air cut through her and raised goosebumps. _

_There was no warmth now. Because there was no Clint._

_Because she, Natasha Aliavnov Romanoff had driven him away. _

_Natasha couldn't help it then. Tears started to bud at her eyes. They rolled down her cheeks and dripped onto the cold rooftop tiles. _

"_Clint…" she whispered between shaking sobs. "I'm so cold alone." _

_And she knew it then. "I miss you, Clint." She gasped. "Come back to me." She raised one hand to the sky, as if attempting to catch a star. _

_Her pocket warmer, her pillar, her partner. "My love." She finally admitted. _

"_Come back to me, Clint." She said softly. "Because I might just be in love with you." _

_But there was nothing but the silence of the sky and the chatter of the city. A police siren wailed in the background. Fireworks crackled in the far distance. And Natasha Romanoff made up her mind. _

_Because if Clint wouldn't come back. Then she would go to him. _

_As if the heavens agreed with her, it began to rain. Not a miserable kind of rain nor a pounding kind of rain. It was a gentle drizzle. As if a blessing. Or an encouragement._

_Whatever it was, Natasha took it as a sign. She stood up, squared her shoulder and took one step forwards to getting her Clint Barton back._

* * *

_Natasha strode into the living room where everyone had assembled. They stared at her for a moment, taking in her wet appearance and in contrast her determined expression. _

"_You've made up your mind?" Pepper said with a smile. _

"_Yes." Natasha nodded. _

"_And?" _

"_I'm going to get Clint back."_

_Everyone cheered. Tony smacked her hard on the back and for once Natasha didn't feel like she needed to do the same. Steve put on hand on her shoulder, his warm grip telling her all she needed to know. Bruce just smiled; his way of saying 'you've done the right thing'. And Pepper. Well she just gave Natasha the biggest hug of all. _

"_Let's get our Hawkeye back then." Tony shouted, raising one glass into the air. _

_And everyone agreed._

* * *

**A/N – Whew. I kinda just churned the whole thing out at like 1am in the morning. What can I say. I get in the writing mood and then it all comes out. So I hope you enjoyed it. The emotions here were pretty high. **

**Next chapter: Natasha is going after Clint! It's high-time. So buckle in and I hope you enjoy the ride. **

**Thanks for putting up with me. And I'll do my best to get the next chapter out quickly~**

**Over and out-**

**Saffa **


	7. There is no love for the undeserving

**A/N – Oooookay here we go! Chapter 6! I thought I better get this out for you guys quick before you virtually kill me in my sleep for the lack of updating… Anyway this one shows a mixture of Clint and Natasha's feelings about each other. Hope you like it~**

* * *

**Chapter 6: Consume yourself with activity; there is no love for the undeserving **

**Clint**

Clint stood on a snowy mountain, inhaling the crisp air with relish. He had always enjoyed being somewhere high and all nature-ish. Which is why when he had asked Fury for a transfer it was to somewhere mountain-ish.

Well, that wasn't exactly true.

In the beginning Clint hadn't cared where he was to be transferred so long as it was far away from Natasha and distracting enough. So Fury had sent him to Las Vegas where there were plenty of big hits to take out. Clint had spent his time taking out the marks (easy enough in the busy place), then enjoying the gambling and finally getting back to bed at 3 in the morning. It was distracting – but not enough. Because Las Vegas reminded him of how good Natasha was at winning the Jackpot. And how even though she was a natural, she would lose on purpose to avoid attention.

So Fury had then moved him to Europe where the women were aplenty. Clint had enjoyed the beautiful country with good food and women. But every time he talked to a female, he just saw Natasha in them. Maybe it was the fiery red hair or the soft planes of her face. Every time he kissed a girl, he would compare it to how he had kissed Natasha that night long ago in Budapest and then he had to stop. Whatever he did to distract himself never worked.

So Clint moved on. This time he chose where he wanted to go. And he chose the Himalaya Mountains. Why? Well it was everything he wanted. It was peaceful, it was clean and it was high enough for the Hawk to see the world below. What was there not to like?

And funnily enough, it was exactly what he needed. He had initially thought distraction was the key. Something to get his mind of Natasha. But he had been wrong. What he had needed was solitude to mull over his love for Natasha and to purge himself of her ever-present being.

The mountains made him concentrate. It was all too easily to be spotted. That was why the targets who SHIELD drove up the mountains into his waiting claws did so. Because they thought being in the middle of a white expanse would allow them to see enemies from afar. Unfortunately to the trained Hawk it was the opposite; they were easier to spy.

And that was how he operated. He dressed in warm white clothing and coated his sleek, black bow with a layer of temporary white paint. Easier to remove but brilliant camouflage. Downside: a STARK invention. Clint would then locate his target who never seemed to bother with hiding and stake out for hours on end till the mark would appear, bleary eyes and with their guard down. A quick shot, double-check the enemy was dead and then bury the evidence.

Snow was perfect for that. It covered his traces and removed any sign that his target had been there. Maybe someone would dig up the body years later. But by then he'd be long gone and most people would first assume the person had died of suffocation. Chances were higher that snow would pile on top of snow and the body never be found. And even if people came searching for his target…well they had a wide place to cover. Clint always made sure to check for tracking devices and the sort beforehand.

So that was his new lifestyle. Wake up, train and kill. It was the distraction he needed. Because fourteen days later into this new routine, he found he hadn't thought of Natasha once.

And that, he supposed, was the way it would remain.

* * *

**Natasha**

"_Where is Clint?" she demanded, smacking her hands flat on Fury's oak desk. _

_Fury winced. The oak was expensive. "I told you Agent Romanoff and I will tell you again, I cannot reveal the location of any transfers. That's the rules and you know it."_

"_Bullshit." Natasha snarled. _

"_Even if I could," Fury said, his eyes showing no signs of backing down. "Agent Barton already requested for me to not inform anyone of the transfer details." _

"_So you won't tell me?" Natasha whispered. She knew that only direct conversation would work with Fury. Any attempts at seduction or trickery would immediately be shot down. And if directly asking didn't work, then she'd have to use another way. _

"_Fine then." She hissed and walked out without looking back once._

_Fury sighed. This fiasco was getting out of hand. He shuddered as his door slammed shut behind Natasha (he was fond of the door as well) and then sighed again. _

"_Am I doing the right thing?" he asked the portrait of Coulson. It was a picture of him and Coulson, arms around each other's back and grinning in the way only half-drunk people do. Fury remembered that night: it was his birthday and Coulson had taken him out for a drink. When he had protested – saying something about keeping up appearances for SHIELD members – Coulson had laughed it off and said only around him could Fury be the hapless guy Coulson knew he was inside. _

_Coulson had always been his left hand man where Maria had been his right hand woman. He was the best at advising when Fury had been unsure. Coulson had made Fury the impenetrable face that SHIELD looked up to. And now that Coulson was gone, there wasn't a day that went by without Fury doubting himself. But he knew what the baby-faced agent would have told him: 'Buck up, boss. You're the leader and you have to show it. Even if you're crumbling inside, you have to be an unmovable wall whom everyone can lean against. But don't worry. Because if you're the wall supporting everyone, then I'll be the foundation that holds you up. Remember that, even when I'm gone.' _

_And Fury did remember that. He remembered it every time he looked at that picture. The words Coulson had said so casually were burned into his soul. _

"_I remember my friend." He smiled, then put the photo away. Because here, in SHIELD, he was Director Fury. And he was the bastard who did the job no one wanted to do. But he did it. He played the devil's advocate. Because someone had to. _

_And it might as well be him._

* * *

**Clint**

It was a bright morning. Being on a mountain meant the sun shone glaringly into his little snow-covered cabin in the early hours. The Hawk was wide awake before the clock had even struck 6.

Yawning, Clint went to check to fridge and found it rather lacking. He had been up here for nearly a fortnight and supplies were running low. So he decided it was high-time to down to town: a four hour drive there and back. Not including the time it took to hike down to where the car was parked. It was worth it though, for the cover this house hidden by the snow offered.

Clint dressed for the cold, grabbed the keys and tucked his bow into the knapsack (easy enough to pull out quickly). But just as he reached for the door, he remembered something and walked back towards his desk where there was a map spread out, held down with compasses and other tools. As he walked back, his knapsack bumped against the desk, making his notebook fall out.

Stiffly Clint picked up his wallet and against his own good will, he opened it. Then he smacked himself softly and said "Move it Barton." He dropped the notebook and walked away.

Because inside his notebook was a picture of Natasha. It had captured one of her rare smiles. It was beautiful. And it was deadly. Because it was a sign that Clint hadn't forgotten Natasha yet.

And that perhaps…he wasn't willing to forget her yet.

* * *

**Natasha**

"_Fury was a no go." Natasha said roughly. The other Avengers nodded. They had expected that. _

"_So," Tony said, voicing what everyone was thinking. "Plan B it is."_

* * *

**Clint**

It was late that evening by the time Clint got back. He was dog-tired but his mind was buzzing – active as hell. It didn't help his mood that the first thing he saw was the photo of Natasha. It made him re-think that night when she told him to leave. It wasn't a trick; it was pure anger behind her words. And he hated thinking of her like that.

So even though Clint was tired, he picked up his bow and arrow and retreated to the small target practice in the basement. And he started shooting.

Five hours later he was panting with the physical exertion but every time he stopped, Natasha's face swam into his mind. He punched one fist hard into the stone wall, ignoring the crunching pain. He knew he couldn't sleep.

So he continued shooting till the sun came up.

* * *

**Natasha**

_The Avengers gathered around the computer as Tony started typing at a furious pace. He spoke out loud as he worked - a habit – but it soothed Natasha to know what was going on. _

"_Hacking in." he murmured as he tapped a few buttons on the screen. "Entering SHIELD database."_

_Bruce scanned the flux of words and numbers that entered the screen. Only he seemed to make head or tails of the scramble besides Tony. Steve just resigned himself to not understanding and in an attempt to be useful, went to make coffee. Thor watched intently, waiting for a sign that Tony had learnt something. Natasha however was increasingly impatient and began to pace furiously. A habit she broke into whenever she felt useless and too inactive. _

_Suddenly, Tony smacked the table loudly. Everyone looked up. _

"_There's nothing useful." He muttered. "It seems Fury didn't enter details about where he transferred Clint."_

"_What?" Natasha snarled, walking over to the computer as if she couldn't trust Tony's words. "That's impossible! Fury always abides by regulations and enters the data. It's a SHIELD rule." _

"_Well…" Tony argued back dryly. "It seems our little Fury is a secret rule breaker." _

_Natasha scoffed. "It must be there somewhere. Otherwise how does Fury get mission details to Clint?"_

_Tony scrunched his face for a moment and searched further into the files. "It seems…" he said slowly. "That Fury sends a message to a certain point and it gets deviated a few times so that it's impossible to trace it before it reaches Clint's receiving point. Therefore to trace him would take weeks. And by then, he's moved on." Tony rubbed his eyes. _

"_So we can't find him?" Natasha whispered._

_Tony looked at her sadly and shook his head. "No we can't."_

"_What do we do then?" Thor asked loudly. "We cannot leave our archer alone."_

"_Yes we can." Said a sudden soft voice who had been completely quiet up till that point. It was Bruce's voice. "We can leave Clint alone if that is what he wants."_

_Natasha looked Bruce straight in the eye. In a very quiet voice she said "What do you mean?"_

"_I mean," Bruce answered unswervingly. "Is it really the best thing to go after Clint when he doesn't want to be found?" _

_Natasha was lost for words. Inside she knew she wasn't concretely sure. She had these nagging doubts about how Clint would respond when she found him. But she had wrestled those thoughts away when she saw how certain Pepper had been that this was the right path. She opened her mouth, ready to say something but unsure as to what to say._

_And then Steve stepped in. "She does have the right." He said suddenly. Everyone went quiet. Bruce raised an eyebrow questioningly but chose to let the super soldier say his peace. _

_Steve looked directly at Natasha. "I said this to Clint once and so I'll say it to you as well. But I lost my one chance at love when I was frozen for seventy years. I don't regret driving that plane into the sea because I did save a lot of people." He gave a half-smile. "What I did regret was where I left it with Peggy. I was in love with her for so long yet I only said it when I left for that final mission. We never did anything together. Heck, we never even went on a date together."_

_Natasha held out one hand and clasped Steve's warm hand in her own. It felt like she could understand what he was saying through this tiny connection. _

_And so he continued. "So I'm telling you that you better go after Clint. Like how I should've woken up immediately and gone after Peggy. Even ten years or ten days would have been enough." His eyes had a distant look. _

_Bruce shook his head, amazed at Steve's loyalty. "It wasn't your fault Steve that you couldn't wake up in time. It was unfortunate chance. _

"_That she died only a few years before I woke up." Steve shot back. "No. I think we have a saying. Something about how you make fate with your own hands. Well, I made my own fate." _

_Bruce bit his lip. "I didn't mean that Steve. Sometimes things are out of your control and you can't do anything about it."_

_Natasha suddenly realized where Bruce was coming from. "You mean how you can't control the hulk?"_

_Bruce stiffened and then let out a sigh. "Yes." He lifted his head to meet Natasha's eyes. "I don't go after the ones I love because if I did, I might just make it worse. I could hurt them, even kill them. And I wouldn't even know it till I woke up." He said raggedly. "You see. Love doesn't solve everything."_

"_You know what I said once," Tony patted the doctor on the back. "That the hulk saved you from death by gamma radiation."_

"_Yeah?" Bruce muttered bitterly. "Fat lot of help he became on the helicarrier. I mean I was the one who hit you, Natasha!" he said sorrowfully. "I nearly killed you." _

"_But you didn't." Natasha said suddenly._

"_Hah. Only because Thor slammed into me." He snorted. _

"_But that time," Natasha shook her head. "You were frightened. You were scared and you were unsure. However during our Manhattan battle, you were totally in control of yourself."_

_Bruce gave a bitter laugh. "Yeah, only then though. And should I risk that one chance for an attempt at love? No, it would be disastrous."_

_Steve then held out of hand to Bruce. "Really? I think you say that because you're too scared to face the possibility." _

"_Of course I am!" Bruce exclaimed, looking at Steve as if he was crazy. "Of course I'm scared at hurting someone. I'm a doctor. I don't live to kill." Then he bit back his words and looked at Natasha. "Sorry." He mumbled. _

_But Natasha shook her head. "I don't take offense. That's my lifestyle and then there's yours." She titled her head and looked at him properly. "You know what I think?"_

_Bruce lifted his head. "What?" _

"_I think you need to live a little. Give love a chance."_

"_But-"_

"_But nothing." Natasha silenced him firmly. "Because we're here. The Avengers are here to back you up if anything goes wrong." _

_Bruce looked at her amazed. This was the first time anyone said they would help the Hulk. It had always been either trying to stop and repress the Hulk or use to Hulk for help. The Hulk had never been the receiving end of aid. And now suddenly he was. Bruce felt tears come to his eyes. _

"_Really?" he whispered. "You'd help me?"_

"_Of course, friend." Thor said suddenly, lighting up the room with his voice. "We're brothers in arm! We help each other no matter what."_

_And Bruce smiled. Maybe all he did need to do was accept the Hulk inside of him and trust in the other Avengers. Maybe he could be a team player. Maybe he didn't have to hurt anymore. Didn't have to feel so out of control. Maybe love was that important to risk for. _

"_Then you should feel the same right?" he smiled slyly, knowing Natasha didn't. _

"_Huh?"_

"_You should know that we – the Avengers – also have your back." _

_He smiled even wider as Natasha stared, stunned, at them all. She surveyed them all and to her surprise they agreed with Bruce. Steve mock-saluted, Tony gave a half bow, Thor grunted with agreement and Bruce, well Bruce had already said his peace. _

"_Therefore, I'm sorry for what I said earlier. I was mean." He grinned. "I shoved my doubts onto you. But you shoved the right back."_

_Natasha couldn't help but laugh at the way Bruce had just said the same thing when they first met back in Calcutta. Even then he had been transferring his doubts onto her and watching for a reaction. Then he had apologized in a soft voice when she whipped out the gun. _

_Bruce held out a hand as a sign of peace. "Forgive me."_

_Natasha grinned. "Already done." But then the smile disappeared because she realized "What do we do about Clint then?"_

_The Avengers were lost for words at that point. _

_Then Tony spoke up. "I can try and track any messages Fury sends to Clint. For now…that might be the best we can do."_

_The atmosphere soured. But Natasha shook her head. _

"_I can't stand sitting around for weeks before we get any news."_

_Bruce spoke up. "What else can we do?"_

_Natasha drew in a deep breath. "Tony will continue searching. But I'm going out there to look for Clint myself."_

"_Natasha!" Steve exclaimed. "That could take forever!"_

"_Yes." Natasha agreed. "But I'll go stir-crazy sitting here. It's better I'm out there looking for him in the places I think he may be."_

"_I agree." Thor said suddenly. "It's better to be battle-ready than sitting around growing old. Let her go. The more who search, the greater the chances of finding our archer."_

_Natasha couldn't help but smile at Thor's assistance. She hadn't expect it from him. No she expected it from-_

_Tony. Who spoke then. "Go." He said roughly. "We'll do our best to support you from here."_

_Natasha smiled, touched by Tony's acceptance. _

"_Then I'll go as well." Steve said suddenly. "I'll search. Maybe not with you – I'll just drag you down – but elsewhere." _

"_And I'll stay here to help Tony." Bruce said, knowing where he was best useful. "I'm sure Pepper will aid us as well." _

"_And I will search the fields as well." Thor chipped in. The other Avengers were a little wary at this idea but decided that was where the Norse god was best placed. "I will enlist the help of Jane as well." _

_Natasha was truly touched. All the Avengers really had her back. And Pepper and Jane were going to be there for her. She truly wasn't alone anymore. All they needed now was their Hawkeye and the group would be complete. She raised her chin. _

"_What are we waiting for?" she smiled. "Let's find him. Our own way. I'm going to start packing" Her heart had never felt lighter. Finally she was doing something. _

_Suddenly Tony grinned. "Oh…I think we have one more obstacle to clear first."_

_Everyone looked at him curiously. _

_So he answered them: "Fury's gonna be furious."_

* * *

_Fury sat at his desk, running through paperwork, when his mailbox beeped. Several times. _

_With a frown he opened his mailbox and there were five emails from each of the Avengers. They all said the same thing:_

"_Dear Fury,_

_Will be taking a short leave of absence. Holiday time. Don't look for me._

_Will buy you souvenirs_

_Ta-ta"_

_Fury sighed, buried his face in his hands and then…grinned. _

"_Good luck, agents." He smiled as he approved their absence._

_Because Fury may be the devil of SHIELD, but even the devil has people whom he loves._

* * *

**A/N – Sorry it was a bit of a filler chapter. And it was a little long. I think it's the longest chapter so far for this fanfic. I know many of you thought Natasha would go out there straight away to look for Clint, but I decided she's smart enough to think things through first and try the more conventional methods before the search-and-rescue idea. I had to chip in a few bits about Clint's life alone as well. **

**The next chapter though I promise, Natasha and Clint are meeting FINALLY! There will be a time gap, but that'll be the reason why they meet. **

**So I hope you've enjoy this chapter. Tell me how you found it~**

**Over and out-**

**Saffa **


	8. Lie, cheat and trick

**A/N – Well, here it is! Natasha and Clint finally meet…well maybe not entirely properly…**

**Hmmm but I'll let you find out yourself~**

* * *

**Chapter 7: Lie, cheat and trick; a woman's arsenal is always full **

**Natasha **

It had been six weeks. Six long weeks of searching for Clint. And it had led to nothing.

She had scoured Europe and America knowing Clint was fond of the two continents. Mostly for their abundance of mountains. She had heard whispers in Italy, snatches in Las Vegas but nothing concrete. She had been to mountains and tracked down other agents. But they had heard nothing and she was at loss.

"Nothing." She reported back to Tony tiredly. She was in France now and searching for signs. "I don't think he's here though. He claims his French isn't that good."

Tony let out a sigh on his end. Nothing either on the radar. Clint was too damn good at hiding for Tony's liking. It was like finding one book in a library with no computers. Back-breaking, drop-dead exhausting work. Bruce hadn't fared any better. Steve was searching Asia and Thor was looking at Australia, but neither had any good new.

Suddenly Pepper's voice appeared. "I think," she said. "It's time to try something new."

Natasha lifted her head from her coffee. She was sitting in a tiny French bistro with her computer open. Looking every part a tourist.

"I think instead of finding Clint, who doesn't seem to want to be found," said Pepper reasonably. "We get him to come to us."

"Explain." Natasha said shortly.

Jane's voice then joined in the conversation to Thor's delight. "What we're saying is that we should lure Clint out."

"Lure?" Even Steve was confused.

"Bait him with a mission and get him to come to us." Pepper explained. "Since we can't find him, we can conclude that we probably won't find him anytime soon either. And he might even return back to somewhere we've already looked. What do you think?"

Natasha sipped her coffee, mulling over the possibilities.

"I think it's a good idea." Bruce interjected. "Get the mouse to come out by using cheese. It's the same theory."

"How do we get the mission to him though?" Steve said abruptly. "Didn't Tony say before that the message was impossible to trace. So how do we know where to send it?"

There was silence as everyone realized Steve's reasoning was correct.

And then a voice interrupted their musings.

"Because I'll tell you where to send the message." Said Fury.

"Director Fury!" everyone exclaimed. They had not expected him to speak. Natasha wasn't the only one to spit out her coffee.

"Yes Agents," Fury said tiredly. "I'm your boss. It's not that much of a surprise to hear me speak is it?"

Tony coughed. "Umm…of course not. You were saying?"

"I'll tell you the coordinates where you should send the message to."

"Why?" Natasha asked, genuinely curious. "You refused before."

"I did." Fury admitted. "But then I knew Clint wanted alone-time. I knew he needed peace. But now…I think even Coulson would be worried."

Steve stiffened as he hear Coulson's name. He still remembered those cards, perfectly kept except for a little boxing around the edges and the bright stain of blood. He remembered them because he kept them afterwards. Sealed in a plastic bag. Even the blood was preserved. A memory for Steve to remember that once again, he was too late.

"Coulson?" asked Tony. "Why would he matter so much?"

"Because," Fury said. "Coulson was like a father figure to Clint. He brought him in and he raised Clint practically. He taught Clint what being human meant. And I think when Coulson died…Clint truly felt like his own father died."

Everyone was silent. They all knew Clint had been a solitary figure and so to find out he was actually so close to someone they had all loved was…shocking. Not that the Hawk could love, but that the love between him and Coulson had been so intimate. Even more so because Clint had barely reacted to Coulson's death. Only Natasha knew that that was Clint's way of mourning: shutting down and closing himself off from the world.

"Coulson would be worried." Fury continued, knowing they were all musing over the relationship between the two. "And it's been long enough. Bring him back agents, that's an order."

"Aye, aye sir." Tony saluted. "Send me the coordinates and we'll get it done."

Pepper finally spoke. "Where shall we get him to go?"

"How about…" Natasha looked up from her coffee to the iconic French symbol. She swirled her coffee and smiled. "How about the Eiffel tower."

* * *

**Clint**

It had been six weeks since Clint had last thought of Natasha.

Ever since he looked at that photo he had tried to run himself ragged. Training constantly with the bow and arrow, then with running in the snow and finally with countless missions. He had probably done more missions in the last month than he had in over half a year. He put it down to the lack of paperwork.

He was mind-numbingly free, but he was exhausted.

He felt it couldn't go on much longer. But he didn't see an alternative.

And then his phone beeped. Distraction. Perfect. It was a new mission.

Clint rolled off his back, packed his bag and left.

* * *

**Natasha**

_It had been a week since Fury had relented and the Avengers had sent out the false mission. It had been a week because the date they put down was a week from then. _

_A week to let all the Avengers assemble in France. A week to let them get prepared. A week to let them steel their resolve so that even if it involved dragging Clint back to SHIELD in handcuffs, they would do it. _

_And a week has passed. Only four more hours to go._

_And then Natasha would see her Hawkeye again._

* * *

**Clint**

It was 8pm. The scheduled time of the mission.

Clint's instructions had been clear. Go to the Eifel tower, 2ndfloor which would be bustling with other tourists cooing over the evening sky, and meet up with a courier who would pass him an envelope to be delivered elsewhere. He was a little confused why he had been saddled with a delivery mission but word was the envelope had to be delivered from 800 meters away: via an arrow.

So he shrugged, dressed casually and had ridden the lift up the Eifel tower.

As usual, he was an hour early. Habit. Stake out the spot and know the ways in and out. Just in case of course.

He lifted his camera from a long, oblong box where his tripod and bow were housed. And he strode around the observing desk, the night air whipped at his hair which had grown a little long in the recent months. He pretended to snap shots whilst he was actually observing the deck.

And then a finger tapped his shoulder. He whirled around; shocked at being surprised which was rare. He half expected it to be the courier.

What he did not expect was a punch to the face.

* * *

**Natasha**

_It was a quarter to 8. Perfect timing to arrive. _

_Natasha knew it was Clint's habit to be early though the time he arrived at ranged from half an hour earlier to nearly five hours early. She estimated that he would arrive somewhere between 6 to 7.30 seeing as the observation desk had limited space. _

_She was only arriving now though because she wanted Clint to feel more relaxed, at ease with the knowledge of his surroundings. _

_However, the minute the lift pinged and the doors slid open, she knew something was drastically wrong. There was the clashing of steel, the stomping of boots and the screaming of people. Natasha squeezed her way out as people dashed into the lift, eager to get away from whatever fight was happening on the deck. _

_Natasha however edged forwards, using the cover of the thick pillars as the perfect shield to hide herself yet see what was going on._

_Oh, Clint was there. He was standing there gorgeously in a deep blue sweater and jeans that allowed him just enough maneuverability yet passed as touristy. In his hand was a wicked looking knife, one Natasha recognized as the one they had bought together in Budapest. It was about the length of Clint's arm, beautifully curved and wickedly black. Clint gripped the corded handle tensely. His stance and slashed arms told Natasha everything. _

_He had been fighting. And fighting hadn't been part of the plan._

* * *

**Clint**

_10 minutes ago…_

Clint swung his body to the left instinctively and caught the fist with his right hand. He dropped the camera immediately and kicked it away. Around him, tourists screamed in a mixture of French and English – they obviously were frightened about the brawl that seemed to be verging on all-out fighting.

"Who are you?" Clint demanded in English, continuing his act of being a tourist. "What do you want?"

But the person who aimed a blow at his face knew who he wanted.

"Vous." He replied in French, his voice rough and scratchy. He sounded like he smoked too much tobacco a day and drank whisky on top of that.

"Qui êtes-vous?" Clint switched to perfect French. "Qu'est-ce que tu veux de moi?"

_Who are you? What do you want?_

The man grinned and then spoke in rough English that had an unmistakable heavy French accent. "I am here…American…to kill you."

"Who sends you?" Clint circled around so that the bag with his bow was behind him. He knelt, pretending to reach for his camera.

"Don't move." The Frenchman commanded. "I don't…trust you moving. As for who I am, well I work for 'Le Hareng Rouge'.

_The Red Herring_.

Clint laughed. It was a good name. The name of a group who would mislead people and lay false trails. "And why are you fishies after me?"

The Frenchman's face darkened. He evidently didn't like being called mere fishies. "We 'fishies'," he said mockingly. "Do not like birds of prey. They…endanger our livelihood."

Clint got it. He was a danger to their group's existence. And they wanted him gone.

"So what are you going to do? Splash water at me? Treat me to smoked salmon for dinner?" The jokes never seemed to end.

The Frenchman spat at his smart mouth. "Simple. I'm here to make an example of you. Because," he grinned here showing off his missing front teeth. "Even birds of prey learn to leave piranhas alone when one of their numbers die."

"So," Clint said. "You're gonna make an example of me. That's why it's the Eifel tower – a big stage."

The Frenchman nodded. He liked it when his prey understood. Then they could skip the formalities and just get to the killing quickly. He would lay the trail, mislead the followers and then leave untouched. "So let's begin."

As he said that, Clint who was still kneeling kicked the camera upwards at the Frenchman. The Frenchman spat (Clint wondered how the man had enough spit) and swung a heavy-handled knife at the camera, knocking it away. In that moment, Clint grabbed his bow from its hidden compartment and fitted an arrow to the sleek weapon…just as the Frenchman dashed in for the kill.

Clint leaned backwards but his bow went flying. Useless for close combat. So he reached for his knife. The one he and Natasha had bought together. He had asked Natasha for some advice and so they had gone shopping. For the record, he counted that as a date.

Clint whipped out the knife from under his shirt and it clashed against the Frenchman's serrated blade. The Frenchman leaped backwards, surprisingly agile and grinned again. It seemed this would be a good fight. Clint may not have been as good with the knife as Natasha, but he could give her a run for her money.

He jumped forwards, slashing at the man's legs which made him scoot backwards. Clint pushed upwards to block the downward swing and then drove in towards the man's chest. And the man just HAD to pull out a second knife didn't he. Clint groaned as his knife reflected off the Frenchman's second knife and instead swung his right leg towards the Frenchman's knee, hoping to force him to bend. But the Frenchman saw it coming and did a neat little backflip, landing on one hand and throwing one knife with the other.

Clint slid to the ground missing the knife by a hairsbreadth. He swiveled and kicked the man's hand, knocking the Frenchman to the floor. In a second he was on his knees and had plucked the man's fallen knife from the floor. He drove the serrated blade towards the man's chest…just as the Frenchman rolled out of the way. The knife clanged angrily against metal grill and Clint swore. But he jumped back just as the Frenchman dove into a sliding kick: boots first. The knife went over the edge.

Clint winced. He hoped it wouldn't hit anyone.

That thought was short lived as both men were down to one knife. Clint flipped his knife in one hand, changing the position so that the blade pointed downwards. And then he lunged in again. With one hand he punched towards the Frenchman's face who blocked it and responded with a downward knife slash. Clint ducked, came in close and slashed at his neck. The Frenchman jerked backwards but Clint had touched metal to skin. He'd drawn first blood.

"You know what?" The Frenchman suddenly said, heaving as he tried to catch his breath. The gash was deep and blood dripped to the floor.

"What?"

"Your good enough to join us?" he grinned. "Want in?"

"Sorry." Clint muttered, standing up straight again and holding his knife out. "I'm already hired."

"Quel dommage." _What a shame._

And the battle continued.

* * *

**A/N – So, you get your first taste of blood so to speak. This is probably the first and only battle I'm writing in this fanfic. Mostly because I'm not really sure about writing about battles, but more because that's how the story goes. There will be a smaller battle later I promise, but this is the big fishie.**

**P.s. I am not French. So don't kill me if i got something wrong. Pretty please~**

**Over and out-**

**Saffa.**


	9. Let the world fall

**A/N – Now, the conclusion of the fight. Thanks soooo much for the reviews that came in! It was like raining chocolate-topped chocolate cones! With chocolate ice-cream in them. Yum~ **

**Let's begin!**

* * *

**Chapter 8 – Let the world fall, I could not care less **

**Natasha**

_Natasha slid around the pillar just as Clint was coming in low towards the other man. He looked French to her with a touch of white in his otherwise dark brown hair. Both men were good. Clint lunged upwards and the Frenchman jerked sideways, skidding backwards and then using the momentum to jump forwards. He caught Clint by the waist, throwing them both to the floor but Clint twisted like a fish, leaning backwards and using his hands for leverage jumped up again. _

_The Frenchman grabbed Clint's ankle in a dead lock but Clint turned around and stomped hard on the Frenchman's back. Natasha winced as she saw the air being forced out of the Frenchman's system. He responded with a cough and flipped over, letting go of Clint's ankle and instead diving straight for his chest. Clint couldn't avoid it. He was leaning right over the man and the knife went through his leg and into tissue. _

_Natasha could see Clint gasp with pain, but that was all he showed. It was enough for Natasha and she ran forwards, sliding her own slim knife out of her thigh sheath. She could see Clint look at her with eyes of absolute shock and the Frenchman narrow his eyes with anger. The Frenchman slid his knife out of Clint's leg and using both his feet, slammed them into Clint's solar plexus. _

_An 'oof' came out of Clint as he was propelled backwards and into a pillar. He must have jarred his head because he paused for a moment, clutching it. In that instant, Natasha slipped forwards and struck the Frenchman as he rose. The Frenchman launched a blind punch which she blocked and shoved to one side so that it sailed past her cheek. She then drove her knee into his chest, choking him again and jerked her right elbow into the side of his head. Stunned, the Frenchman swayed. _

_In that time, Clint had recovered his senses and was back with one knife in his hand. The Frenchman sensed the battle was not in his favor and responded by pulling out a gun. He quickly fired three shots at Natasha who ducked and ran into close, wielding her knife like a sword. However, the Frenchman stabbed his knife in deep and Natasha gasped with pain but slid one leg behind his left leg and tugged him backwards, making the Frenchman fall towards the edge. He hit hard against the metal fencing and it suddenly gave way. _

_The Frenchman flailed for a moment and as the fencing fell over the edge, he swayed. But all of a sudden he grabbed Natasha by the edge of her long sleeved shirt. He ripped the material and the force was enough to pull Natasha down with the Frenchman. For one horrifying moment, she leaned over and saw the dizzying heights. Then a warm hand grasped her shoulder and pulled her backwards – to safety. It was Clint's. _

_He grabbed her forcefully and slashed with his knife at the Frenchman's wrist. The Frenchman howled and fell, slamming hard into the floor as his feet disappeared below. But as he slid off the edge, he lifted his left hand in which the gun was held and fired at Clint's chest. Clint keeled over and the man grabbed his foot, pulling Clint over the edge with him. _

_And suddenly, Clint was gone._

* * *

**Clint**

Air whooshed past his ears, sounding like a hurricane as he fell. He could still feel the Frenchman's grip on his foot but it loosened slowly as the Frenchman realized they were both doomed. Taking the chance, Clint kicked the Frenchman for all he was worth and felt the man slip away. The force propelled him backwards, even in midair, and he looked upwards feeling the air buffet his body.

Above him, Clint could see Natasha bewildered face, shocked and horrified. She was peering over the edge and there was nothing he could do to stop that terrified expression.

_Sorry, Nat._ He thought._ I always have to make you cry, don't I? _

And suddenly something smacked into his back. A huge impact that choked the air out of him and brought black spots to his vision. It was hard and he felt bones cracking and splintering. He must have hit the ground. _Funny_, he thought dazedly_, the ground was much nearer than I expected_. And the pain was overwhelming. It burned through him like a blazing fire. And then it swallowed him whole.

* * *

**Natasha**

_Natasha screamed. She couldn't help it. One moment Clint was right there fighting beside her and the next thing she knew he was falling. His face as he looked up at her was sad and a little wistful. And she had screamed. _

_Voices buzzed in her ear. The other Avengers were questioning her. Why was she screaming? What had happened? Where was Clint?_

_But all she could do was scream his name: "CLINT!"_

_And then there had been a huge CRASH. Like the sound of iron colliding with iron. Like the sound of bones breaking on concrete. Like the sound of a puppet breaking on the streets below. Natasha closed her eyes and cried. Because she was so sure that Clint was dead. That he was broken into tiny pieces. _

_She heard the air whirr as the sound of Tony in his Ironman suit zoomed past her. There was the sound of him stopping as his stabilizers held him up. And then suddenly a voice of hope came in the form of Tony's voice._

"_He's alive."_

_And that was all that Natasha needed to hear._

* * *

**Natasha**

_What had happened was that Clint had smashed against one of the metal girders which held the tower up. The towers had a sloping architecture and the archer had fallen against one of the higher beams. The impact had hurt him, but the beam had saved him._

_The Frenchman on the other hand had hurtled to the ground. Clint had kicked him away. Him letting go of Clint and then being kicked away was what saved Clint ironically. Instead, the Frenchman had died when he fell. A fitting end Natasha supposed._

_But all she cared right now was Clint's wellbeing. Tony had flown Clint up carefully and laid him down on the 2__nd__ floor, far away from the faulty edge. She had knelt beside him carefully, ever so carefully, and whispered his name. She didn't dare touch him, afraid that she would harm him more. _

"_Clint. Clint." She whispered. "Wake up. Open your eyes please."_

_She watched his uneven breathing like it was her lifeline. It was the only sign he was still alive and still kicking. _

"_Clint." She murmured, wanting to shake him or slap him or hit him but knowing she couldn't. It was frustrating. Meanwhile Tony called for a SHIELD helicopter to be sent immediately. Natasha vaguely heard a response of 'ETA 5 minutes' but all she cared about was Clint opening his eyes. _

"_Please, please." She begged. And suddenly his eyes cracked opened. They flickered so quickly Natasha thought she had imagined it. But then they opened more slowly and Natasha saw his beautiful steel blue eyes. _

"_Na…tas…ha?" Clint said croakily. He coughed and blood came out. _

"_Shhh…" Natasha put a hand over his mouth to stop him from speaking, then wiped away the blood gently. "Don't speak. Just stay alive. For me, okay?"_

_But of course stubborn Clint didn't listen. "I'm…so…sorry…" he whispered, barely able to get the words out of his mouth. "For…give…me…"_

"_Shhh." She said. "I forgive you. How could I not. Because…I…I…might be in love with you."_

_Clint's eyes widened as she said the magic word. He opened his mouth but then coughed some more. Natasha placed one finger to his mouth and soothed him as he finished his bout of coughing._

"_You…love…me?" he asked. _

_Natasha nodded. "I was just too stubborn to realize it before." And Clint smiled. _

_At that moment, Natasha couldn't help it. She leaned forwards and ever so gently pressed a soft kiss to his lips. She didn't care that their kiss tasted of blood or that it was completely inappropriate. What she did care was that Clint kissed her back. Softly, gently. It was a simple kiss. Nothing passionate. But it was a kiss that promised forever…or goodbye. _

_Clint looked completely at peace then. He was broken and bloodied, but he looked like he had found his own personal angel. And so he closed his eyes with the image of Natasha still imprinted behind his eyelids. _

_Natasha however wasn't reassured. She began to feel alarmed as she saw Clint slipping away. "No! No! Don't fall asleep. Stay with me."_

_But it was too late. Clint had closed his eyes. _

_Natasha wept. Silent silver tears that fell on Clint's cheek. Tears that rolled off his cheeks and mingled with the blood soaking the floor._

"_Stay with me, Clint." She cried. "I love you." _

_And that was how she stayed, crouched over him and crying, until the helicopter came and took them away._

* * *

**A/N – Well. That's this chapter done. Much more dramatic than I thought it would be. And I hope the fight scene turned out well. **

**Thanks for reading. Next chapter: what happens to Clint? Well you'll find out soon enough.**

**Over and out-**

**Saffa**


	10. Do fairy tales ever have happy ending?

**A/N – Hey everyone. Next chapter is served! And yes, Clint and Natasha have finally been reunited. But…is it the way you all imagine? Well, you'll find out now!**

**Also, thanks to everyone for reviewing. I was positively, genuinely, absolutely delighted when I saw the review number go over the 30s. It may sound small, but it's the most I've gotten so far. You have no idea how I happy I was! So do keep reviewing. Trust me, any more and I'll start doing Mexican dances (no i do not have a clue how to dance Mexican) in my bedroom and scaring neighbors. **

**With that said, enjoy this chapter~**

* * *

**Chapter 9 - Do fairy tales ever have happy endings?**

**Natasha**

_Natasha stood in front of a grave. She laid flowers on the ground. Brilliant white and red flowers that she had no clue as to what they were, but had a delicate look and wonderful smell she knew he would've loved. _

_She knelt on the ground, looked at the beautiful stone inscription on the grave that said 'A friend, a warrior and a man who never knew how to back down. You will always remain in our memories.' No tears came to her eyes now. They had long been dried. But words buzzed on her tongue._

"_I got him back." She said softly. "I found him, Phil." Ever since he had died, Phil Coulson had become more of a Phil and less of a Coulson. Everyone at SHIELD thought it made him seem more…alive…more…part of the family. _

"_Fury said you'd be worried. So I came to have a little chat with you." Natasha touched the headstone fondly. "Clint was in trouble for a bit. But he's recovering now. I'll make sure of that." She smiled as she imagined the dead agent and how relieved he would have been. It would have shown on his face. _

"_But…" Natasha frowned now. "It's been a month since we retrieved Clint. And he's still asleep." Natasha leaned forwards so that her forehead touched the cool sensation of stone. It made her feel as if she was touching Coulson, as if he could really hear her. _

"_The doctors say all the bones he broke when he fell, all the cuts he sustained from the fight…all of that have healed or are healing. Physically he seems fine. He _looks_ fine!" The words poured out now, the floodgate broken. All of Natasha's worries and complex feelings surged to the surface. "Yet he's still asleep!"_

_She scratched at the ground with a stick she found. She gripped it tightly – the only sign of her frustration. "I mean why is still asleep! I told him I loved him. He said he loved me! There's nothing stopping him from waking up is there?"_

_She tried to calm herself, breathing in and out evenly. She knew what Phil would ask now. He would ask what the doctors had said. Professional advice before emotional. _

"_The doctors say that he should be waking up any time soon now as well!" she cried out loud. The graveyard was mostly empty so she disturbed no one. "I mean, they said he was emotionally tired from the mass of missions he did whilst he was away. That he ran himself ragged, so to speak, and may have needed some time to recuperate…but I mean it's been A MONTH!" _

"_One month!" She stabbed the ground furiously. "And they still say nothing seems wrong."_

_If Phil was there, she knew he would've put one hand on her shoulder and shared a warm silence. He was not one to give false reassurance. Rather he preferred to say without words that he was there for her, through thick and thin. _

"_So why…" Natasha gulped, feeling very emotional. "Why do I feel like something is so wrong? Why does my heart tell me that I should worry, that I should ignore the doctor's reassurance and believe something is wrong? Why?" _

_Natasha also knew what Phil would say next. If professional advice seemed shifty, then fuck it and just follow her own emotional advice. She grinned through the tears that threatened to appear. _

"_Got it, Phil." She smiled, letting one tear trace a path down her cheek and fall to the ground. "I'll believe in myself more." _

_Natasha stood up and brushed the dirt off her jeans. She gave the gravestone one last look. Then she gave a small nod and blew a kiss. Normally, she would NEVER let other agents see her display so much emotion. But for Phil who meant so much to Clint, she would risk that._

"_Bye Phil." She whispered. "I'm off to save his ass again."_

_And as she left, a warm wind blew. It tossed her fiery red hair to one side and made her halt, turn around and grin at the gravestone. "Still up to your old tricks, huh?" she chuckled before walking away. "Spell you later." _

_Because Natasha may have imagined it, but it felt like the wind just said 'Good luck'. _

_Even if it didn't, it was good enough for her._

* * *

**Clint**

Drowsy…so drowsy…

Feel…like…sleeping forever. Like never opening my eyes, like never…moving this cumbersome body. Eyes like lead. Arms like steel. Everything is so…difficult to move.

Perhaps…staying here…in this cool, soothing water…is the best thing.

And then…PAIN! Stabbing pain, jolting pain, pain that cuts through to bone. Pain that curls and pain that squeezes. Pain that makes staying in this world…more…desirable… And then the pain is gone. But it hurts still. Aches. Better to stay here, where the cool water washes it away.

Don't wake up. Don't go back.

Stay here….forever…

* * *

**Natasha**

_Natasha flung open the hospital doors and practically pelted down the corridor to Clint's hospital room. The nurses had long given up on telling her off. For one thing, they knew she wouldn't listen. For the other thing, they also knew she could avoid crashes easily. She was a SHIELD agent after all. _

_Skidding around the corner, Natasha launched open the doors and shocked a white-coated doctor who stood by Clint's bed, taking measurements. _

_The doctor heaved a sigh of relief and said irritably "You could've knocked." _

_Natasha smiled, feeling lighter at the sight of Clint's rising and falling chest. "Why should I? Not like Clint's going to answer."_

_The doctor shook his head good naturedly and then replaced a clipboard of paper. "He's doing fine." He said, anticipating Natasha's first question. "But it seems like there's no change."_

_Natasha sighed. She had expected this. But it was no concern to her; she would wait forever if need be. The doctor patted her on one shoulder and left. Natasha stiffened for a second. It may have been a trick of light, but the doctor's expression had seemed to be one of anger. Natasha's forehead creased as she thought things over. Perhaps he had just been angry with her abrupt entry. Nothing more to add, so she simply vowed to keep an eye on him in future. _

_Clint right now was the priority. She walked over to where the very-used –and-very-scuffed red chair was. Scooting it over, she sat down right next to Clint and lifted one warm hand. She pressed his hand to her cheek, feeling the warmth pass through her travel-cold face and towards her heart. It was moments like this that reassured her. That said Clint was alive and the chance of him one day waking up was possible. _

_He twitched. Natasha froze as she felt the movement. She leaned in close to Clint's face, watching intently for any sign of further life. "Clint?" she whispered, breathing onto his cheek. "If you can hear me, wake up please. For me?"_

_But there was no response. Just Clint's even breathing. _

_Natasha sighed. No change. She leaned forwards and kissed Clint on the cheek. It felt rough under her lips for it had been days since anyone had shaved him. The soft stubble though, was another sign of life – of growth. It had to be good enough for now. _

_Natasha let her head fall forwards so that it rested on Clint's chest. She turned sideways to look at Clint, feeling the movement of his chest reverberate through her body. She enjoyed this feeling, the feeling that said he was still a breathing, moving, living being. For a while, Natasha just lay there. Then she closed her eyes. And let Clint's breathing lull her to sleep._

* * *

**Clint**

Breathing. Inhale. Exhale. Breathe more.

Let the water wash over. Let the water soothe, cleanse, promise safety. Promise no pain. He could stay here forever, he could. In these cool ripples he could rest until kingdom comes.

But…what is this feeling? This soft brush of feathers, this tentative touch of…lips? This familiar smell of gunpowder and nutmeg. A bewitching, familiar scent that makes his nose twitch, that makes those eyes which feel like lead flicker and yearn to see red. The same red as autumn leaves.

It feels so…familiar that he wants to wake up. If only to inhale that smell, to see those tempting red flames flicker like candlelight. It only…to touch those feather-light lips again, to taste that sinful chocolate flavor. And he strains to touch that velvety softness. To reach out…to stroke…to caress…

But the water pulls him down, down, down. Down into a deep watery grave. Where light cannot penetrate the surface and all is dark. A cool, comforting darkness. It drags him further down…

And he would be fine with that. If only there wasn't that smell, that touch and that taste.

If only…

But he cannot do anything against those watery chains that bind him tightly. Or against that sudden sharp pain. The pain that makes him curl up and sink further to a realm where pain does not exist.

All he can do right now…is fall…

* * *

**Natasha**

_The sounds of soft footsteps woke Natasha up. Not because they were abnormally loud, but because they were too soft. Too deliberate. As if someone was sneaking around. _

_Natasha continued breathing, focusing on ensuring they were as even and slow as the breaths of someone in deep sleep. She cracked her eyes open a slit and caught sight of a shadow over Clint's body. The dim light told her that she had been sleeping for hours. It was late afternoon by now. _

_Natasha frowned. There wasn't meant to be any doctor checkups till late evening at least. This…out-of-routine visit worried her. Her first fear was that something had gone wrong with Clint and the doctor was here to check up on that. Then logic told her that the doctor would have woken her so he could've looked at Clint properly. Instead, the doctor had chosen to move quietly – suspiciously. _

_Natasha tilted her head slightly, so slightly that it would look like nothing but movement in her sleep, and caught sight of a doctor. It took her seconds, but then she recognized him: he was the same doctor from earlier. The one who had given her a brief annoyed expression. The one she had meant to look out for. The suspicious one._

_What was he doing? She didn't move as the doctor glanced at her and then waved two fingers under her nose as if to assess if she was sleeping or not. Suspicious indeed. _

"_Sleeping I think." The suspicious doctor muttered. Seemingly satisfied, he pulled his hand backwards and shuffled through his pockets. What he drew out was a slim black box. That didn't worry Natasha. The injection needle inside did though. Natasha forced herself not to stiffen or move in any way that would alarm the doctor. Instead, she watched as he carefully prepared the needle, tapping it to release bubbles and then positioning it over the IV drip bag._

_Just as he was about to inject whatever solution was in there, Natasha spoke loudly. "What are you doing?" she hissed, leaning up and away from Clint. _

_The doctor jumped. Literally. He nearly crashed into the wall behind him, but he didn't drop the needle. Instead, he lowered his hand carefully and plastered a friendly expression on his face. An expression that Natasha did not trust. _

"_Oh, this?" he pointed with his free hand to the needle. "It's just a little booster that will help Mr. Barton out. It was prescribed to help his immune system and hopefully aid him in waking up." The doctor's tone was so friendly and warm that Natasha could have almost been fooled. If she hadn't been a spy that was._

_But Natasha was a spy –a damn good spy – and so she was naturally suspicious. "Is that so?" she murmured, keeping her eyes focused on the doctor. "When was it prescribed? I don't remember being told this. And I informed staff members to let me know ALL the chemicals that go into Clint." _

_The doctor to his credit did not stumble. He simply took one step closer and showed her the needle. "That's because you were sleeping." He explained kindly. "We were going to tell you once you woke up."_

_Natasha still wasn't pleased. "Even so, Clint's injections routinely happen ONLY at 9pm daily. Why do it so early?"_

_The doctor's forehead creased for a moment. It was a tiny movement but it was enough for Natasha. She reached out with one hand to displace the needle but the doctor ducked expertly. Too expertly for a mere doctor. _

_Natasha kicked the red chair out of the way and jumped over Clint's prone body. She didn't dare reach for her gun in a hospital and she could see in her eyes that the doctor knew it. Instead she drew her favorite dagger, a tiny silver thing with enough blade to gut a chicken, and lunged forwards. The doctor slid to the right, cradling the needle in one hand and pulling a gun out with the other. Natasha wasn't going to let that happen and kicked upwards, sending the gun spiraling towards the door. _

_The force made the doctor stumble backwards and he reached out for the walls for stability. Natasha lunged forwards, aiming one fist for his solar plexus. But the doctor blocked – clearly he was an expert in close quarter combat – and leaned in close, delivered a bone-crunching blow to the side of her head and then kicked viciously at her stomach. Natasha groaned as she flew backwards. _

_The doctor rushed forwards, needle in one hand towards the IV drip bag again. Natasha couldn't let that happen. She skillfully stopped, rose to a crouch and then threw the silver dagger. It pinned the doctor's white coat to the wall and he staggered backwards, stopped. Growling, the doctor ripped his coat off and only just managed to block as Natasha came in for a low blow. Natasha used the force to slide around him, locking her leg around his left and jerking him to the ground. The doctor let go of the needle and it went spinning across the floor. Natasha hopes the loud 'thud' sound as the two fell would attract attention. _

_But for now, she was on her own. The doctor was on the ground and she grabbed for his arms, pulling it behind him. She was aiming for a body lock. But the doctor was stronger than she thought. He reared upwards, clearly desperate and Natasha was thrown backwards. But she landed as gracefully as a cat and dashed forwards…only to be met with the muzzle of a gun. That went off. _

_The sneaky doctor had hidden another gun. When he had reared backwards, he had grabbed the spare gun and fired. Obviously he had given up on discretion. Natasha had not been expecting the other gun and took a shot to her stomach. The force of the bullet made her reel backwards and stumble against the wall. She slid to the floor groaning as the doctor reloaded and shot another two bullets at her leg. Natasha refused to give him the satisfaction of showing pain. _

_Instead, she reached for the nurse alarm button that was just an arms-length away. She knew it would not only alert the nurse station but all the other Avengers as well. And Natasha was never shy in admitting when she needed backup. Especially when Clint was at stake. So she ignored the fiery pain in her stomach and left leg and snatched the alarm button up, pressing it quickly and hearing a comforting buzz. "Help!" she yelled into the machine before the doctor kicked it away._

"_You just have to ruin things, don't you?" The doctor snarled, obviously annoyed at his plan being foiled. He walked over to the door, locked it and then shoved the nearby desk against it. "And I was nearly done." _

"_Doing what?" Natasha asked, desperate to stall for time. Desperate to find out what had happened as well. _

"_Killing the Hawkeye, of course." The doctor grinned as her. He closed the window blinds, blocking them off from the rest of the world, and then retrieved the needle from the floor. After checking it for damages, he smiled. Not a good sign, Natasha thought. _

"_You were poisoning him." Natasha guessed. The doctor confirmed her theory with his slight frown that marred his otherwise friendly face. He obviously didn't like her quick thinking as he spat angrily at the ground. Natasha raised an eyebrow. He definitely wasn't a doctor if he treated hygiene so blatantly. _

"_Yes." The doctor said, resigning himself to telling the truth. "It was a poison injected into his IV drip bag daily. It kills him slowly, so slowly that it will look like a natural death."_

"_And that's why he's been asleep for so long." Natasha growled, the truth finally coming to light._

"_Correct again." The doctor admitted. "But it's a natural poison. One that other doctors would have never detected. After all, why would you detect poison when the patient is here for fighting injuries!" he laughed nastily. "And just a few more shots would have killed him for good."_

"_No matter." The doctor shrugged. "I guess I'll just have to increase the amount a little and our little Hawk will come crashing to the ground!" He pulled out the black box again and fiddled with several more needles. "As for you, Black Widow…" he looked at Natasha with a nasty expression. "I'll have to make sure you say nothing either." _

_Natasha growled. She definitely couldn't let the man inject anymore of that poison into Clint. She mentally wanted to beat herself for not noticing this earlier. But she would have to make do with the present. Natasha ignored the pain and lunged for the doctor's feet. She caught him by surprise and the doctor fell. One of his precious needles smashed on the floor, the contents spilling in a viscous pool. _

_The doctor swore, then kicked at Natasha where the bullet resided in her leg. She hissed as his foot connected and starbursts of pain exploded in her vision. Then he stood up shakily and stood over Natasha with a very angry expression. _

"_Very well." He scowled. "I'll deal with you first." _

_Natasha peered up at the man just as the he brought one foot down on her head. She curled up and shielded her head with her arms, but his kicks were powerful and she gasped with each one. This couldn't go on longer. So Natasha kicked the wall, propelling her away from the man and spun around, grabbing his discarded gun in the process. She surged to her feet and suddenly the world shook around her. He had hit her head too many times that her vision was going double. She snarled with anger. The doctor just laughed and then swatted her into the wall. _

_Suddenly there was a hammering at the door. Nurses no doubt worried at the sounds of crashing and crunching. The doctor realized time was growing short and quickly extracted another needle. Striding over to the drip bag, he unceremoniously stabbed the needle into the bag and pressed the lever down. _

_Natasha howled as she saw the liquid vanish. She screamed as she saw Clint twitch and groan in his sleep. She cried as the doctor grinned and pulled out another needle._

_And she felt a piece of her heart break as she saw the liquid vanish into the IV drip. _

_That heart of steel shattered. _

* * *

**A/N - Okay, truthfully I cut this chapter short. Originally it over nearly 5000 words. And it was a...little...long. So I broke it into 2 chapters. Don't worry though. This chapter comes out first. Then I'll post the next one first thing tomorrow. **

**I'll give you guys some time to digest this chapter first. The next one concludes the second fight. **


	11. Facing the flames to fulfill a promise

**A/N – Sorry to people who hated me for making them wait even longer to see what happens (guilty face), it just so turned out that I could break up the two chapters nicely. **

**From the sounds of it, chapter 9 seemed to kill off one or two people. (guilty face) Sorry…well not really. The moment the thought entered my mind, I deleted the three or four paragraphs I had written and replaced it with that. It felt more interesting that way. And we get a bit of Coulson here as well~ So alllll good right?**

**But here's the conclusion of the fight. ****No big surprises or heart shockers. Promise~**

******Well (teehee) not that much.**

* * *

**Chapter 10 – Facing the flames to fulfill a promise**

**Clint**

Burning pain. A pain that sears throughout his body. He feels like a pig roasting on a fire and vows that if the pain ever stops, he'll consider being vegetarian. But the pain doesn't cease. Not like it normally does. Instead it grows like a crescendo, getting worse and worse.

All thoughts of the smell and touch and taste of that familiar person disappears into the hungry flames. All he can think of is the desire for water to pour, water to rain down on these burning fires and extinguish them. He squirms and shakes, trying to escape but never succeeding.

And then suddenly there's a black tunnel in front of him. He runs for the tunnel, hoping to escape through darkness and the minute he enters there is…there is sudden relief. A cooling feeling that melts his body into a puddle of water. The flames are gone. Here is peace.

Here, he doesn't mind staying forever.

* * *

**Natasha**

_Natasha struggled to her feet and the doctor injected the second needle. Clint was convulsing now, properly shaking in his bed. The doctor continued grinning, sparing Natasha a sideways look. He saw her straining to get to her feet, to get to her Clint and then shook one finger at her. _

"_Now, now." He smiled wickedly. "Spiders should know better when to run away. You know, when the boot's coming." The doctor picked up his second gun from the table and fired. Natasha skidded to one side, but not fast enough. The bullet hit her shoulder and the force jerked her backwards. _

_Satisfied, the doctor pulls out a third needle. _

"_Clint!" Natasha couldn't help screaming now. "CLINT!"_

_She made one last herculean attempt and lunged forwards. The doctor, thoroughly irritated with her and the banging sounds from outside the door, grabbed her and pulled her upright. He traded the needle for his gun. Positioning the gun right in front of Natasha's face, he smirked. "Guess you won't get to see your boyfriend die. Sorry?" _

_The doctor lifted his index finger, placed it slowly on the trigger and pressed down hard._

* * *

**Clint**

He's standing in the tunnel, with his back to those hungry flames. He has no desire to turn back to those flickering flames. Instead, he'll move forwards. He's not afraid of the dark.

But suddenly there's a scream. "CLINT!" comes the familiar voice. So, so familiar.

He can't help it. He stops and turns around. Because that voice is nostalgic. As is the name.

And suddenly Clint remembers. _Natasha._

Clint turns around. Runs forwards. Heads back into those hungry flames.

Because though the flames mean pain, they also mean Natasha. And facing any flames is worth the pain if it means being with Natasha.

* * *

**Natasha**

_Natasha heard the bullet leave the loading chamber. Heard the bullet fly into the air, straight for her face. And then suddenly she was pulled backwards, down onto the bed and the bullet soared right above her head. She felt the heat, the movement and the impact of the bullet striking the wall. But she was alive. _

_Natasha turned around, feeling warm hands on her arm and a warm breath down her back. Because the one who saved her was none other than her Hawkeye. Her Clint._

"_Clint!" she breathed as she saw those steel-blue eyes hardened with pain. The doctor however didn't look happy at the sight of his target awake. _

"_How can you be awake?" he hissed. "It should have just taken one more needle." The doctor spat as he looked towards the last needle, resting on the wooden table. He lunged for it, but Natasha was faster. She kicked out furiously, catching the doctor's outstretched arm and knocking it off balance so that it brushed the needle and sent it crashing to the hospital floor. _

_The doctor, finally out of needles, snarled and launched himself at a new target: Natasha. This time though, Clint launched into action. He threw Natasha over him, surprisingly strong for someone bedridden for nearly a month, and grabbed the doctor with his other hand. Muscles bulged as slammed his other fist into the doctor, making the doctor fall backwards. Then he smoothly slid out of bed, crumpling for a moment but quickly straightened and then slammed one foot down on the doctor's foot. The doctor gasped with pain and doubled over. Clint took the opportunity to kick his knee upwards, catching the doctor in the ribs and sending the doctor's eyes rolling backwards. _

_The doctor swayed and then fell. Clint huffed with the exertion, clearly exhausted. Natasha leaped over the bed for the second time that day and caught Clint just as he fell backwards. _

"_Hey Nat." he whispered. _

_Natasha lowered Clint to the floor as his knees gave out, checking quickly to see if the doctor was truly out. Then, satisfied, she returned her attention to Clint. "Silly boy," she smiled, trying to hide her worry. "Stop trying to protect me all the time."_

_Clint chuckled roughly. "Sorry Nat. It's my full-time duty."_

_Natasha slid one hand down his neck, feeling for his pulse. It scared her. It was too fast, too erratic. He needed medical help immediately. She lowered him to the ground, intending to unbar the door. But the false doctor suddenly rose, grabbing the gun on the floor and fired blindly. Natasha was too slow to react, but Clint somehow did. He sat up quickly, pulled Natasha down to the ground and turned around as if to shield her. The bullet struck him straight in the back, lodging itself under his fifth rib. Clint gasped and sagged forwards, just as Natasha pulled out her gun and fired. The bullet soared true. It struck the doctor straight in the heart. _

_The doctor let out a small "Oh" as he saw the small hole in his chest. Then his eyes rolled backwards and he collapsed to the floor. Just as Clint collapsed against Natasha. Blood leaked out and soaked her soft cotton top. _

"_Clint!" she shook him with horror. "No…no, no, no, no!" _

_Suddenly, the door blasted off its hinges, burying the dead doctor below. It was Thor. When the door had not opened by conventional means – i.e. lock and key – the Norse god had arrived first and broken down the door. The rest of the Avengers and nurses spilled into the room._

_The head nurse took one look at the scene: Natasha crying with Clint and a pool of blood in her lap as well as the doctor buried beneath dust, a door and a table. Then she put on a professional mask and kicked the other Avengers out. The remaining nurses quickly removed the doctor – who was determined dead immediately – and then lifted Clint onto a stretcher. _

_Natasha cried out in protest as Clint was removed from her, but one nurse firmly pushed her to the ground. When she struggled, they injected her quickly with something that made her dozy. _

"_Sedative." They reassured her. But Natasha was inconsolable. _

"_Clint!" she struggled. "The doctor poisoned him. Some of it is still in the needle." She pointed to the half empty third needle that lay on the floor. Some of the contents were spilled but the majority was still inside. _

_Bruce quickly entered the room, shouldering aside the protesting nurses and picked up the needle carefully with gloves. "I'll find out what poison it was." He promised Natasha. "Sleep for now."_

"_No!" she strained, trying to sit up. But the nurses were stronger than she thought. They forced her to remain sitting, telling her that Clint was heading straight to ICU and she needed her wounds to be treated. But Natasha wasn't the type to sit around, waiting. She wanted to be there and watching him. _

_However after the harried events of that afternoon, she was exhausted. The injection was taking effect and no matter how much Natasha struggled, the sedative was stronger. It pulled her under water and suddenly, everything went black. _

_But even in the darkness, all Natasha could think of was the gunshot, the warm body protecting her and the sudden shock of blood. All she could think of was Clint. Clint protecting her even when he was at his lowest, Clint taking the bullet for her as he had always promised. Clint falling. Clint bleeding. _

_Her Clint. Dying._

* * *

**A/N – Okay wow, I quite enjoyed writing the last two chapters. There were bits of sadness, bits of anger, bits of fighting and then more drama. This chapter might have been a little shorter because it was the second half of the previous 'over 5000' worded chapter. But hopefully it's enough action to satisfy you all. **

**I know many of you were expecting Clint to wake up here. Sorry~ Had to add more drama. Clint just waking up after all that was too easy. But don't worry. The conclusion is coming soon. **

**Hope you enjoyed this chapter. Let me know how it went. Please review! They spur me to write faster~ And they make me happier than a hyperactive three year old. So it's the best of both worlds. Review please!**

**Over and out-**

**Saffa **


	12. The melody that soothes me to sleep

**A/N - Anyway, here's the next chapter. It delves more into Clint and Natasha's past. Only little tidbits of it, though I may plan another story about Clint and Natasha's past and their meeting in Budapest. That'll come around later though. For now, enjoy this chapter. It's concluding soon! Maybe 2 more chapters after this? **

**Alsooooo, THANK YOU SOOOO SOOO SOOOO MUCH FOR THE REVIEWS. Seriously, they just keep increasing. First it was the sad twenties, then the sudden thirties and forties and now the fifties! I mean right now I'm just one review away from the golden 60! And I've had over 10,000 hits. Sooo I'm beyond happy. So here's your sugary sweet chapter, please EnJoY~**

* * *

**Chapter 11 - The melody that soothes me to sleep**

**Natasha**

_It had been a week since Natasha had caught the doctor attempting to inject poison into Clint's IV drip bag. One week since she had fought the doctor. One week since Clint had woken up…and then fallen asleep…_

_It had been one frustrating week. Mostly because the doctors wouldn't let her see Clint. They tried to reassure her with data and facts. That Clint had undergone intensive medical care to remove the bullet and patch up the wound, then a detox to flush out the poison as best as possible. Bruce and Tony had headed off to the lab and within hours came back with a potential cure. _

_Twenty-four hours later, Clint had still been in ICU. Not for the bullet wound, but to be monitored whilst the potential cure took effect. _

_And then forty-eight hours later, Clint had come out of ICU. He had been placed in a ward under heavy lock and the constant care of an Avenger. And then he had been left to heal for the next four days. _

_And Natasha still hadn't seen Clint yet. _

_The doctors had warned her it might be a traumatic experience. They had said some crap about her developing emotional side-effects of seeing Clint in such a damaged state and that it would be better for the both of them to remain separate for the time being. Natasha had told them to fuck it and let her see Clint because there was no damn way she would be that delicate. _

_Of course they hadn't taken that well. When the doctors had threatened her with sedatives, she had turned to the other Avengers believing the whole 'on the same side' crap. However the traitors had sided with the white-coats and told her to go rest. The Avengers all promised they would watch him like hawks, so to speak, but it was no good. Not good enough if Natasha couldn't see him in person. _

_Back in Stark towers, Natasha paced up and down her locked bedroom. They had barred the windows, sealed the air vents and locked the door electronically. Then they had only opened the door to feed Natasha. The worst thing was that she couldn't beat up the person who fed her to escape because it was Pepper and beating up Pepper was far too low for her to do. Damn Stark for thinking things through to this extent. _

_Natasha paced some more. All the Avengers had recommended for her to rest, but right after the fight, she had slept for a full two days under the effect of stress and sedatives. And those two days were excessive in her mind already. Since then, she hadn't slept more than a few fitful hours a night. Her mind was too full of Clint all bloody and broken again. Dreams turned to nightmares which blurred the Eifel tower fight and the hospital fight into one gory vision. Dreams that always ended with Clint dying and Natasha waking sweat-streaked and crying. _

_Pepper had become Natasha's constant companion. She had watched over Natasha for the two days she slept and then some more when she woke and cried for Clint. But even the sweet strawberry-blonde couldn't be there all the time. She had Tony's company to run and Tony to look after. So when Pepper was gone, Natasha would run herself ragged with exercises to try and take her mind off things. But that always ended with her wounds opening up. _

_So Stark had threatened to tie her to the bed. Something both Natasha's pride and sanity couldn't allow. So, glowering at the billionaire, she had promised to keep her exercise to a minimum – a.k.a only pacing. She knew Tony was watching her from the cameras above, ready to intervene if necessary. _

_So Natasha's every waking and sleeping moments were filled with Clint. Only rare chats with Pepper assuaged her fears. For Pepper brought her photos of Clint sleeping, then a live feed of Clint in his hospital room. Natasha had hungrily watched the rise and fall of Clint's chest. Even if it was digital, it was real. She had hugged the strawberry-blonde so hard Pepper had nearly choked. But Pepper had laughed it off and hugged Natasha fiercely back. _

"_It'll be alright." She told Natasha. "Clint's healing and he's protected by the Avengers twenty-four seven. And Bruce is the one monitoring all medicine that comes and goes from Clint's room. He's got the best care possible." And Natasha had been assured for a while…until Pepper left and the fears starting growing again. _

_But true to the Avenger's words, Clint had been watched. Natasha saw them come and go from the camera feed. He was never alone. _

_Sometimes it was Steve who sat there reading aloud. He firmly believed that speaking would bring Clint back to them. _

_Sometimes it was Bruce who simply explained all the medical procedures aloud, as if reassuring Clint what good hands he was in. Bruce always believed that knowing information would soothe oneself. Perhaps he was right because Natasha felt soothed._

_Sometimes it was Tony who would sit around making wisecrack jokes about him trying out archery and somehow being kicked out of the archery range because he might've shot Fury in the ass with an arrow. But that it was definitely not his fault. _

_Sometimes it was Pepper who came by with a few sweet words and news about Natasha. She believed that if Clint heard anything about Natasha, he would wake up faster. _

_Sometimes it was Thor. Good, virtuous Thor who would regale Clint about his Asgardian lifestyle and adventures. He told Clint that Clint should one day come to Asgard as he would love hunting Bjarls. Some sort of huge, fanged and drooling creature. Natasha thought she would have to intervene on that trip if she didn't want Clint coming home a soggy puppy-dog biscuit. _

_Sometimes it was Jane who popped by whenever she had the chance. She would tell Clint about how love was worth it by using stories of her relationship with Thor. That she was glad things were working out between him and Natasha. And Jane would always leave a cup of hot chocolate with marshmallows behind when she left. _

_And sometimes it was Fury who simply sat down and stared at Clint, as if willing him to wake up. Fury always brought a picture of Coulson with him. _

_It made Natasha smile to see all the Avengers care so much about Clint. She knew if Clint was awake he would be embarrassed beyond believe. He had always stuck to the shadows, so him being in the spotlight always made him nervous. _

_But Natasha really wanted to be right there next to him, holding his hand and feeling his chest move. Feeling that he was alive. What use was she here in this dingy room? So despite the camera feed and visits from Pepper and Jane, Natasha was going stir-crazy. She couldn't handle being far away from Clint for so long, not when they had finally admitted to wanting each other. And so she would pace for hours on end or lie in her bed, exhausted but unable to sleep._

_But the end of the week, she had dark circles under her eyes and a parched throat from not speaking for so long. Even Pepper's words couldn't cheer her up anymore. _

_So Pepper decided to try something new._

* * *

**Clint**

Clint felt people move around him. There was a constant flurry of them: shifting, talking, joking and laughing. But he sensed all of them were worried. Worried about him.

Clint couldn't help it. He wanted to wake up, wanted to go to Natasha who when he last saw her had been crying again. He wanted to hold her close and promise her that he would never let her go. Promise her that he would never make her cry again. But he couldn't.

For some reason, he was trapped now. There were no more watery chains or flickering flames. Instead, he felt like he was trussed up tight. Bound by rope to a wall. Paralyzed with a sting. He couldn't move an inch. It was incredibly frustrating.

Clint would try to move a finger but couldn't. He would try to twist his head, but couldn't. He would try to open his mouth and say something, but couldn't. Whatever this paralysis was, it would freeze his entire body. Then it would weaken slowly so that he was on the brink of freedom and all of a sudden there was be a pinprick of pain and the paralysis would start all over again.

It was annoyingly frustrating.

Natasha was out there somewhere. And he was stuck in here. Unable to fulfill his promise.

* * *

**Natasha**

_Natasha clenched and unclenched her fists for the fifty-sixth time that night. It was one of the 'less strenuous' exercises that Tony had permitted and it helped her active mind to do something as mundane as counting. But she still couldn't sleep. It had been nearly twenty-two hours since she had last slept. And that was about half an hour rest. _

_Suddenly there was a soft door knock and Pepper's voice came from the other side "Natasha! Are you awake?"_

_Natasha rolled out of bed immediately. "Yes, come in." she said. _

_Pepper slid the door open and quickly shut it behind her. The door automatically locked. She held a tray with two mugs, some snacks and what looked like some DVDs. "Midnight snacks." She offered, lifting the tray towards Natasha. "I figured you might want some company." _

_Natasha's mouth quirked into a small smile. She knew Pepper hadn't been sleeping much lately and it had all been for her. She could never hate the good-hearted women. "Thanks." She smiled and took the tray, lowering it to the table at the end of her bed. _

_She lifted a blue mug and sniffed. Hot chocolate with marshmallows. Pepper grinned and took the other mug. Natasha knew the woman was still trying to make her sleep, though she drew the line at secretively drugging her (as Tony wanted to do from day 1). For that, Natasha was grateful. _

"_What are these?" Natasha asked, picking up one DVD. _

_Pepper smiled and took it from her. "I thought…" she began. "It might help you relax a little."_

_Natasha tilted her head as Pepper slid off the bed and inserted the DVD into the TV. She turned around, holding the remote and walked back to the bed. _

"_What is it?" Natasha asked curiously. She spared a quick glance at Clint's hospital feed. No change. _

_Pepper sat down with a serious look on her face. "I'm worried about you Natasha." She said truthfully. "I know you're worried about Clint. But you need to worry about yourself as well. Sleep, rest…make sure you're ready for when Clint wakes up."_

"_I can't sleep, Pepper." Natasha shook her head. "It just all turns to nightmares."_

_Pepper bit her lip, then pulled out a box from her pocket. "I know…so I'm offering…" she proffering her hand. Natasha knew what they were. Sleeping pills. Natasha shook her head. "I can't." _

_Natasha also knew that if Pepper was offering drugs, then she was really worried. But Natasha couldn't, didn't want to sleep. Call her a sadist, but if Clint wasn't sleeping properly then she didn't want to either. _

"_I didn't think so." Pepper tucked away the box. Then she picked up the remote again. "So I brought you this." She pressed play and the DVD started. _

_Natasha opened her mouth, ready to ask if it was some sort of recently released movie meant to distract her and say that she didn't really want it. But then she stopped. And closed her mouth. Her eyes widened and she scooted closer to the TV. _

_Because Pepper hadn't brought her a movie. She had brought her a montage of videos. Videos recording Clint with Natasha, Clint with the Avengers, Clint, Clint and more Clint. It was a movie of just…Clint._

* * *

**Clint**

The paralyzing sensation was weakening again. But Clint expected it to return again.

Suddenly he heard voices, clearer than before. "I think we can take him off the cure." Came Bruce's voice loud and clear. "I think the poison's well and truly gone."

"Okay, then." Tony nodded, tapping something electronic. "Don't let Natasha know though. I want to see how he fares for a day before we let her know anything."

"Okay." Bruce agreed. "We'll monitor him carefully. I'll take over the next shift."

"Thanks." Tony said.

"How's Natasha doing?" Bruce inquired.

"Not so good." Tony sighed. Clint felt alarm building. Not good? What had happened with Natasha? Was she injured? Damn the paralysis, he thought. He needed to be with Natasha right now. "But Pepper's got a plan." Clint could practically feel Tony smile as he talked about his beloved girlfriend.

"Good." Bruce rumbled. "But the faster Clint wakes up, the better she'll be."

Clint struggled against the bonds. He had heard Bruce. He had to wake up, NOW! Struggle, strain and squeeze. Anything to get out of this dreamworld and back to reality.

Anything to get back to Natasha.

Clint leaned forwards, muscles straining…and then the ropes broke.

And light flooded his world.

* * *

**Natasha**

_Natasha was glued to the TV. It was a record of Clint, proof he had walked this earth. _

_It was a video of Clint's past. When he had been in the circus. So long ago it was old and faint. But there was Clint as a child. He was wearing a clown's hat, evidently snatched from the hatless clown next to him, and was balancing carefully along a tight-rope with hands spread wide. He looked like a bird about to take flight. And the suddenly he toppled! _

_He leaned to one side and nearly fell! Natasha gasped. But then he regained his balance and stumbled the last few steps to the end of the tight-rope. He jumped up and down with glee and then actually fell! But the clown caught him and tossed him back into the air good-naturedly. Clint's face had been genuinely happy. As if there had been no care in the world other than achieving that small circus trick. _

_Then the video changed. It was of the circus again, but this time Clint was even younger. About eight. He had his arms around an older boy who looked very similar to Clint and the two were grinning widely. There was cake in front of Clint and he blew the candles out. Then there had been a loud smattering of applause and the boy next to him – Barney, Clint called him – suddenly picked up a portion of the cake and smashed it into Clint's face. Clint had yelled, swallowed some of the cake mess appreciatively and then chased Barney around the circus with another piece. The whole clip was filled with laughter. Nothing but laughter. _

_Now, the video showed Clint when he had first entered SHIELD. He had only been eighteen then and looked extremely young. She couldn't help but stare in wonder at his babyish face, so untouched by the scars and hard life he had faced. But even then, he had pain in those blue eyes that spoke of a tormented childhood. She felt for him. Natasha reached out to brush the screen-_

_And the video changed. Clint was older now, perhaps about twenty. He had a hard set to his mouth, tough and impenetrable. It spoke volumes of the missions he had been on. The lives he had taken. He was in the archery room of SHIELD HQ and was shooting arrow after arrow. Natasha drank in the smooth motion of draw, aim and fire. It was like poetry in motion. It was so familiar that Natasha could help but feel tears appear. _

_Natasha turned around to Pepper who watched in silence, wonder filling her eyes at such an innocent Clint. "Thank you." She whispered. "Thank you so much." Pepper simply hugged Natasha and they both continued watching. _

_The next clip was of Clint and Natasha. Natasha had no clue where Pepper had found it from, but it was a CCTV moment of them both in Budapest. They were blood-splattered and sweat-stained, but they both had the biggest grin on their faces. Natasha remembered. It was right after they had smacked this villain around the head and Clint had invited Natasha to SHIELD, to be with him. _

_Then, the next moment was exactly as Natasha remembered. It was when they were lying on their backs, looking at the night sky and then a shooting star had blazed ahead. They pointed at the star and looked at each other. _

"_Make a wish." Clint said softly, unwilling to break the spell._

"_I don't believe in wishes." Natasha had said. "I believe in making my own wishes come true."_

_Clint had laughed. "That's so you." He had said. "Guess what." He then whispered throatily. _

_Natasha stared into those steel-blue eyes. "What?" she whispered back. _

"_I like making my own wishes come true as well." He breathed and then leaned in close. They paused for a moment and then Clint pressed his lips to hers. It had been a short kiss, but a warm one. It had been their first and last kiss for the next few years. She would never tell him, but it was a kiss she treasured. Though it was a kiss they had both put behind them. Until now. _

_Pepper took Natasha hand and gripped it comfortingly. Then the next clip started. It was a video that clenched Natasha heart for it was the moment when Loki had taken his scepter and pressed it to Clint's chest, sucking the will out of him. Then there was the horrifying moment as Clint's eyes dulled to a misty blue color and he had followed Loki willingly. _

"_All things good and bad." Pepper whispered, squeezing Natasha's hand. Natasha couldn't help her dry mouth and took a sip of the cool hot chocolate. "They get better though." Pepper added. _

_Because the next video was of the moment on the helicarrier. It was a little static, but Natasha remembered the moment perfectly. It was when Fury had called over the intercom that Agent Barton was heading towards engine 3 and any free agents should engage him. It was the moment Natasha, broken and bruised by her encounter with the Hulk, had gone after him. The video showed their fight of near misses, swinging fists and slashing knifes. And then it had ended with Natasha's punch straight to his face – a perfect K.O. _

_Natasha couldn't help but giggle at that. That moment had been priceless. The first time she had ever taken out Clint through hand-to-hand combat. His expression then had been too good. Pepper joined in with her laughter. _

_The next video made Natasha stop laughing, but instead smile with wonder. Because it was a video of the Manhattan battle. It showed all of them: Tony flying around in his Ironman suit and luring the giant flying beasts into buildings (Pepper gripped her hand tightly here), Steve beating up the Chitauri and reflecting Tony's laser beams onto more of them, Thor and Bruce teaming up to beat up another large beast. And then her flying on one of the Chitauri machines towards Clint. _

"_Nat?" he had said, tilting his head slightly. _

"_A little help here." She had replied coolly. She always trusted Clint. _

"_I got it." He grinned, drawing back his bow and firing an arrow at Loki. Loki had caught the arrow at point-blank range. But Clint had planned it. It exploded. And Loki went flying. _

_She remembered that moment. When she knew for sure that she had her Hawkeye back. The bird that would always watch her back. _

_Then there was a video of all the Avengers eating. It had been the night after the Manhattan battle. They had all gone out for shwarma which Tony claimed was pretty good. It was also a hilarious moment to watch because she remembered how unsociable they had all been then once they realized they had nothing in common to talk about. But she and Clint had shared a basket of fries and traded shwarma when she realized she didn't really like the lamb one but preferred the chicken one that Clint was eating. _

_She hadn't said anything; she'd just taken a bite of the lamb, chewed it and then frowned a little. The next thing she knew, Clint had taken it out of her hand and replaced it with his chicken shwarma. She had given him a small glare but smiled when he polished the lamb shwarma off quickly, preventing her from retrieving it. They had ignored Tony's curious look that night. And she had finished her chicken shwarma that had once been Clint's. She remembered its abnormally good taste. _

_Pepper giggled at that scene. _

_And finally, there was a video of her and Clint lying together. It was the night after the shwarma dinner and all of them had crashed at Stark towers. But Clint couldn't sleep. He was plagued with the fear that Loki (who was next door) would mind-control him again and he would nearly kill Natasha. Natasha knew he had been feeling that way and had snuck over. He had been tossing and turning in bed but he froze when Natasha slid in. _

"_Didn't see you entering." He laughed softly. Natasha prided herself in being the only one able to sneak up on the Hawkeye. _

"_Thought you might want some company tonight." She had whispered before cuddling up with Clint. She just as much as him needed reassurance. That he was still there. That he wouldn't be walking away anytime soon. Perhaps it was that night that she had first felt the spark of love. _

"_Hmmm…" he had murmured, turning around to pull her in close. "I'm not refusing. You do make a irrefutably good teddy bear. " _

_She had given a secretive smile and then buried her head in close to his warm, muscled chest. "Idiot." She smiled and then fell asleep. That had been the best night sleep she had gotten since the phone call from Coulson telling her that Clint had been compromised. She had wagered then that that was also Clint's best night of sleep since Loki's arrival. _

_And now, watching herself in Clint's arm, Natasha felt herself doze off. She curled up at the end of the bed and Pepper stroked her hair in a hypnotic rhythm that sent her to sleep. Sometime later, she felt Pepper pull the mattress up, turn off the lights and leave the room. _

_But Pepper left the video on. _

_She knew that the voices would soothe Natasha and chase away nightmares. That Clint's voice and laughter would be the melody that sung Natasha to sleep. _

_Pepper knew this. Because that was what Pepper had done when Tony first went missing. Made a video, listen to it all night and then had fallen asleep to the sound of his arrogant, cocky, adorable voice. The next day there had been a phone call saying Tony had been found. _

_So Pepper knew. That good things always followed the bad._

* * *

**A/N – I loved this chapter. Mostly because it's got some sweet moments of Clint and Tasha developing. That even in the past there was some totally toasty chemistry. I might consider writing an oneshot about that Tony video Pepper made. Hmmm, we'll see. **

**Anyway, hope you enjoyed this one. Some adorable fluff and all~ Next chapter, yes, it's all coming to an end very sooooon! But keep the reviews coming. I want to know your feelings~**

**Over and out-**

**Saffa **


	13. Dreams do come true after all

**A/N – So sorry for not updating recently. I've been having trouble again with the final few chapters. But here it is! Another chapter of fluffy clouds and sheep and stuff. And yesssss…it's the moment you've all been waiting for! YOU KNOW WHAT HAPPENS!**

* * *

**Chapter 12 – Dreams do come true after all**

**Natasha**

_Natasha was dreaming. It was a mix of moments of Clint and Natasha in Budapest, moments of Clint and Natasha at SHIELD training, moments of Clint and Natasha lying together in that soft bed after the Manhattan battle. It was a wonderful dream. _

_Then the dream shifted again. Natasha was lying in her bed again. It was right before she had slipped into Clint's room…but then instead of her leaving her room, she sensed…someone entering her room. She felt the door open, heard the soft steps on the carpet and then a rustling of bedsheets as someone settled down on the bed._

_A hand tentatively touched her head, stroking her flame-colored hair gently. Up and down. Up and down. The touch was rhythmic, the feel addictive. Someone leaned in close, brought her hair to his lips and kissed it gently. He smelled of leather and fletching glue and coffee. The scent made her nose twitch. _

_It was a good dream. One that Natasha didn't want to wake up from. She shifted and reached out for dream-Clint. She tugged him close and he responded warmly, lowering his body around her with that wonderfully heady scent of coffee and those soft, soft lips on her cheek. It could only be a dream. But Natasha didn't mind; she snuggled in closer. _

_She heard dream-Clint chuckle in that dark manner of his and tuck Natasha in close. In her dream, she could feel his heart beat strongly, thrumming fast but constant like a bird. She could feel his even breaths tickling her neck and his fingers stroking a silky path down her face and neck. It was such a good dream that she flipped over to face Clint, her eyes still closed, and kissed him hard. It was only a dream after all._

_To her surprise, dream-Clint responded passionately. He kissed her back like she was the air and he was drowning. She wrapped her arms around his neck and pulled him closer, as if she couldn't bear be further away. When he pulled away, she tugged him down for another kiss and he smiled. She could feel the smile against her neck. Natasha rolled over so she was pressing down on dream-Clint. Then she inhaled…inhaled deeply. The smell of coffee and leather was so…real…so…possible that it made her want to cry. After all, this was a dream. _

_And in a dream, crying was okay. So she let the tears fall. _

_And suddenly dream-Clint sat up straight. "Natasha!" he cried. "What's wrong?" He shook her worriedly and took a good look at her. _

_Natasha opened her eyes. This wasn't so dream-like. She didn't want to open her eyes, fearing that Clint might disappear, but she did. And Clint was still there. _

_In front of her._

_Real._

_Not a dream._

* * *

**Clint**

Natasha squeaked. A completely unexpected sound to Clint who had never heard more than a few sexy laughs. He had definitely never heard so much of a scream come out of Natasha. But there it was. An insanely cute and unexpectedly girly squeak.

She stared at him. Then fell off the bed.

"Natasha!" Clint yelled, scrambling off the bed to where Natasha lay fallen on the ground, looking extremely confused and extremely disoriented. Natasha picked herself up and stared at Clint again.

"Clint?" she asked, still sounding half-asleep. She poked his arm and frowned. Then poked again. "I'm not dreaming, am I?"

Clint stared at her for the longest of times. Then he collapsed into a sitting position with his back to the bed, tilted his head back and laughed out loud. He couldn't help it. Natasha's confused expression was too good.

"You're not dreaming." He laughed. "Though later you might wish you were."

Natasha rubbed her eyes, pinched herself and then let her mouth fall open with wonder. Because Clint was right in front of her: healthy and laughing. And then common sense took over. Natasha picked up a fallen pillow and smacked Clint hard on the head.

"Ow!" he complained. "Told you, you might wish you were still sleeping."

But Natasha dropped the pillow and scooted closer to Clint. She still couldn't believe that dream had been reality. She had hugged Clint, _kissed_ Clint! Natasha felt her cheeks heating. Clint tried to muffle his laughter at Natasha's red face, but it was too precious and he burst out laughing exuberantly.

Natasha, thoroughly embarrassed, smacked him with the pillow again. "Idiot." She muttered. Then she stood up, prepared to do anything but look down at the gleeful Clint on the floor. But she did take a quick glance and froze as Clint looked up at her with the darkest, steel-blue eyes ever. Dark eyes that flashed like a sudden summer storm.

Suddenly, he swiped one leg out and knocked Natasha over. She squeaked again as she suddenly fell. But Clint caught her expertly in mid-air and smoothly slid back onto the ruffled bed. Natasha couldn't help but laugh out loud. Here was her Clint, being a gentleman as always. He had even caught her quickly so she had barely felt her wounds twinge.

Breathing softly, Natasha peered up at Clint. She was sprawled in his lap and he was looking down on her as if she was the sole star in a black sky: the only source of light in the universe. Natasha reached out with one hand to touch his smooth cheek. It grounded her belief that he was here and he was alive.

"Are you alright now?" she asked, running her hands up and down his chest to check for injuries and feeling for his bandages. "The poison. The wounds?"

Clint laughed and fended off her hands. "I'm fine! I'm fine! Mmmm but I don't mind the touching." He grinned wickedly. Then he stopped and stared at her. Natasha looked down to where his gaze pointed and saw her shirt had rode up, the creamy bandages exposed. "You fought for me." He whispered, leaning down so that his lips touched her wound.

Natasha felt fire building up at his touch. Not because of pain, but of passion. She put her hand to Clint's cheek, feeling the roughness of scratches only just healing. "Of course. For you." She whispered.

Clint frowned and brought Natasha's hands close to his lips. "Tell me what happened." He said softly, his eyes peering straight into hers. Searing into her soul. "Tell me everything from the beginning of this whole chaotic mess."

So Natasha did. She told him how she felt when he first kissed Maria. How she had felt angry and jealous and dangerously violent. "I hated it." She admitted slowly. The Black Widow was not one to expose her emotions, but to Clint who wanted the truth so badly, she would do it.

"I'm sorry." Clint kissed her hand again. He peered into her eyes and Natasha could see his honest intent. "At that time, I really didn't know what else to do. I wanted answers. And I knew you wouldn't give me them, so I took action."

Natasha looked at him. It was true; she couldn't deny it. Back then, had Clint asked her about her feelings for him, she was sure she would have never replied truthfully. But what he had done was wrong as well. He had hurt the both of them, but he was apologizing for that.

"I forgive you, Clint." Natasha said softly, looking straight back into his eyes. "After all, where we are now would have never happened if you had never started it all. We might still both be back at base sidestepping each other."

"Just…" Natasha said seriously. "Never again, okay?"

"Of course." Clint smiled. "I promise."

Natasha smiled. A heavy burden she never knew was released. She felt lighter than she had in ages. Then she continued the story. "When I found out you left. It hurt. It really hurt."

Clint's expression sobered, but he said nothing. The only other sign of his sorrow was the slight tightening of his fist.

"Pepper and I had a talk and I guess…it was then that I first realized I loved you." Natasha tilted her head away here, looking slightly embarrassed by such intimate talk. "So I went after you." She said simply.

"You…went after me?" Clint sounded half-surprised. He knew it would have been tough for Natasha to admit she was in love for him, let alone announce that to everyone. And then she had gone further to declare a search for him! His eyes softened with love.

"Yes." Natasha said firmly. "It was partially my fault your left. So it was my duty to go after you." She had a fierce glare in her eyes.

"So what happened?" Clint questioned. "How did we both end up in France? It wasn't simple chance, I wager."

Natasha smiled secretly. "It was Pepper and Jane's idea to lure you out with a fake mission. Fury gave us permission and we planned it all." She suddenly frowned then. "But we didn't expect that Frenchman…"

Clint looked at her curiously. "Did SHIELD find out how that happened?"

Natasha gave a heavy sigh then. "Infiltration."

Clint stayed silent, letting her continue at her own pace.

"A doctor was killed three months back. He went on a short break to Iceland for two weeks. SHIELD deduces it must have been then that he was killed and swapped out with a spy who managed to gain all his personal information from his retinal scan to his habits. They must have been spying on him for ages." Natasha frowned deeply at the thought of such a detailed infiltration.

"When he came back, no one knew differently." She sighed. "Apparently he was a workaholic who never really socialized but stuck to the formalities. So a lot of people trusted him but never really talked to him.

"And the result," Clint finished. "Was that he snuck into SHIELD perfectly."

"Correct." Natasha nodded. "He was trained well in hacking because he learned of Fury's message which was sent to you. He then relayed this information to Le Hareng Rouge who must have dispatched the Frenchman that attacked you."

"Which is why," Clint concluded. "The Frenchman came earlier to attack me, hoping he could finish me off before you arrived."

Natasha nodded again. "And when he failed, the doctor at base took over the job to finish you off. He tried to poison you."

"How did you catch him?"

"I think he was desperate." Natasha bit her lip. "Normally such a professional shouldn't make a simple mistake like that. But a few days earlier, Fury announced there would be a randomized identity check for everyone. Fury issued that because he was worried about how our mission had been interrupted in the first place."

"So he rushed towards the end and you discovered his plot." Clint smiled, realizing again that he was only here because of Natasha. And she was only here because of him. A full circle. That was what they had gone through.

"And then Bruce found a cure to counter your poison which worked just in time." Natasha breathed with relief as the story came to an end. "And now you're here." She mock-frowned.

Clint smiled teasingly. "I wanted to surprise you." He whispered and pressed a kiss to her cheek. Natasha smoothly extracted herself. She gave him a full-body scan.

"And how are you, truthfully." She demanded, tugging at his shirt. "Tell me the full report."

Clint rolled his eyes, but knew she was rightfully worried. "The poison has been successfully flushed from my body. It was Bruce and Tony who decided it was safe enough to take me off the cure. My broken ribs are still healing but the cracked ones are doing well. And as you can see, from the one month in the hospital most of my other broken bones healed well."

Natasha inspected his body, shucking his shirt off and greedily devouring the sight of healed skin. "And the bullet wound?"

"It's healing. And you?" Clint lifted her chin. "Don't lie to me."

She averted his gaze. "During the fight in France I only sustained small cuts and bruises. Nothing damaging. But in the hospital fight, the false doctor shot me a few times. But it's fine now." She hated talking about what she considered signs of weaknesses.

Clint suddenly smirked teasingly and then said. "Well, I better check you're telling the truth." He purred and lifted the bottom of her soft pajama shirt.

"Are you sure they don't hurt?" he whispered so close to her she could practically feel his hot breath tickling her skin.

"Sore…" she admitted. "But now that I've seen you, I'm fine." She smiled. That much was true. Worrying about Clint all week and then suddenly seeing him healthy had detracted all thoughts of pain.

"Besides." Suddenly, she turned the spotlight back onto Clint. "You're the one who worried everyone!"

Clint cringed. "I only had one bullet wound." He muttered in defense. "Whilst you had three."

Natasha tched. He had looked up on her medical files. "Then you'll know that they were removed immediately. And that bullet wounds are considered normalcy in our routine. On the other hand, you suffered poison attacks and bullet wounds simultaneously!" she countered

Clint raised both hands in a sign of surrender. "Okay, okay. But I worry." He dimpled, giving Natasha the most adorable expression she had ever seen. Natasha realized then that she wasn't breathing and then exhaled loudly. Clint grinned.

"And?" Natasha demanded. "Are you sure you're not downplaying your injuries. I know you hate the hospital."

Clint tried to wave it off, but when Natasha gave him a stern glare, he relented. "I've got a clean bill of health! Confirmed by the doctors!"

Natasha glared at him. She knew of Clint's chronic hatred for hospitals. He always escaped them the minute he could physically move. "Honest! Otherwise the other Avengers would be chasing me down right now." He rolled his eyes playfully. "Pepper let me in after all. Do you think she'd let me enter if I hadn't had a doctors leave?"

Natasha bit her lip. The bit about Pepper was true enough. And she could see that Clint _seemed_ fine. He was joking, he was laughing and he was moving about athletically again. He didn't seem to be in any pain of sorts at all.

"So you're all fine now?"

"I'm fine. Well…." He trailed off and tilted his head to the ceiling, unwilling to let Natasha see his expression.

"What!" she asked sharply. Then relaxed as Clint lowered his face to reveal playful eyes that danced as he watched her.

"Well, a little R&R never hurt." He smiled, waving both hands in the air. "You know. A beautiful woman to take care of me, watching my every needs…" he grinned wider. Natasha smacked him softly and then drew him close.

"And what woman did you have in mind?" she whispered. "Not Ms Maria Hill, right?" she said archly. Clint winced. Payback time.

"I was testing you, Nat." he said, rubbing his face as he thought aloud. "And it was the only way to tell if you loved me or not." He looked down at her with eyes so genuinely regretful that Natasha felt like forgiving him immediately. But he wasn't in the clear yet.

"And…where?" she spoke clearly. "Did you get this idea from?"

"Ah…" Clint floundered. "Well me, Bruce, Steve and Tony kind of had a chat…and I thought Tony's idea was best…so…"

"I see," Natasha sat up straight. "So I'll have to go kill Tony then."

"Wait, wait, wait, wait…" Clint grabbed Natasha by the waist and pulled her down again. "You don't have to be in such a rush."

Natasha raised an eyebrow carefully and gave Clint a pointed look. "I mean." Clint continued. "We are…alone…for once" he smiled.

Clint pulled Natasha closer, teasingly close, and whispered against her cheek. "I think we should…make…full use of our time." He murmured.

"Doing what?" Natasha teased.

"Hmmm…" Clint mock-pondered. "How about…how you about I just show you." He smirked, that evil, wicked, adorable grin of his. And then he tucked Natasha underneath him and prepared to show her exactly what she had been missing.

* * *

**A/N – So. They have met! Hope you liked this chapter~ I did. Things have been resolved and the two are finally back together. But the story's not over yet! I've got about three more chapters planned. Thanks to Jaymie for pointing out that I should mention Natasha's severe wounds here. Anyway, the next chapter will be a little more…intimate ^^. So wait for it eagerly!**

**Also one last thing. THANKS SOOOOO MUCH FOR REVIEWING! We're over the 80s and i'm beyond happy. I'm going to try and make sure the next chapter comes out much sooner. Like tomorrow if i can. Actually you know what. I'll get one out by today. Consider it my 18th birthday promise to you all~ See you soon!**


	14. A way to prove I love you

**A/N – Originally there was only meant to be two more chapters. But I thought it would be nice to have a slightly sexier chapter so here it is. After this, there'll be two more. So for now, this is my birthday promise fulfilled. May not be able to upload for a while, but I'll try to get another chapter done by this weekend!**

* * *

**Chapter 13 – A way to prove I love you **

**Natasha **

_Natasha gasped as Clint leaned in close, so close that their lips were touching. She could feel his warm breath misting and it teased her unbearably. He licked her lips, tantalizingly so, so that she trembled. It left her begging for more. And then just when she thought she would die of impatience, he pressed his lips to hers. She responded equally passionately. She buried herself in the motions of his mouth moving in tandem with hers, his tongue tangling with hers. The warmth and the oh-so-soft texture of his lips. _

_Natasha could feel his hands bury themselves in her fiery-red hair. She relished in his expert touch. How he would run his hands through her hair and murmur how it was like a waterfall of fire. How he would twirl her hair the way candy floss is twirled. How he would kiss her like she was the raft holding him afloat. He kissed her like the world was about to end and she was his last moment. _

_Natasha ran her hands through his short, sandy hair. She reveled in the joy of its silkiness, of the way it ran through her hands like water would. Silky smooth and with the barest of resistance. And then her hands crept down his neck, tickling them with a circular motion and undid the zipper of his soft autumn-colored jumper that brought out the shine in his steel-blue eyes. The previous glimpses of his toned body had been marred with her desperation to check for injuries. The material she had shucked away before had barely sated her appetite for skin. _

_Now, Natasha had no reserves. But Clint wouldn't let her touch him yet. He teasingly laced his fingers with hers, pushing her arms above her head and trapped it against the headboard. Then he kissed her again. His kisses started at her mouth and trailed down her cheek, down her neck and towards her collarbone. Each one burned like fire against her skin. Pinpricks of joy burst in her stomach as he left another kiss on her body. _

_Natasha could feel Clint smile against her skin: a dark wicked grin at the glee of knowing he was heating Natasha up. This time he reached out with one hand to lift the corners of her cotton shirt. She felt the cold air-con brush against skin and shuddered. But almost instantly, warmth bloomed as Clint reached down and kissed a trail across her stomach. He rose, kissing higher and higher as he peeled the restrictive material away until the pajama top tugged at her arms. She moaned and wriggled at the enticing sensation of lips on skin. _

_Almost willingly, she shrugged her way out of the cotton top. But as the material blocked her vision, Clint ducked in close and teasingly kissed her right in the middle of her chest. She shivered as he did so and flung the rest of the pajama top off. Clint grinned in the half-darkness of the room. _

_This time, Natasha smiled back. A calm, wicked smile that promised darkness. She wouldn't let him control the situation for too long. Natasha slipped out of Clint's grasp and flipped him, just like she would flip enemies larger than her. He landed on the soft mattress with an 'oof' that Natasha secretly thought was adorable but would never say it. Instead, she cat crawled over him and slip her hands under his jumper, feeling smooth muscles and rough scars that marked his life. She rubbed circles over his defined abs, murmuring pleasure at his lean frame. _

_Clint simply lay there, eyes lazily half-closed with the pleasure of Natasha's massaging fingers that roamed his body. They crept in seductive circles, going higher and higher each time and marking each muscle, tracing each scar. At one point she felt the bump of bandages where the bullet wound had been. But her touch was gentle, intoxicating more like it. Clint groaned with pleasure and Natasha grinned. _

"_Incy wincy spider climbed up the water spout." Natasha sang as she sketched her hand up his chest, exposing more skin as she pushed the jumper away. Then she slid her hands down his chest in one fluid movement and sung. "Down came the rain and washed poor Incy out." _

_And then she began slinking her hands – both of them this time – up his chest, fully exploring each side. "Out came the sunshine and dried up all the rain." She pressed her lips right above his belly button and kissed softly. Then she moved upwards, kissing her way right to his chin and singing in between kisses. "And Incy Wincy spider climbed up the spout again." _

_When Natasha reached the top, she took his jumper in one hand and slid the material off. Clint didn't resist this time, too intoxicated with kisses to move. Natasha smiled as she slung the jumper to the far end of the bedroom. She kissed him along his neck and Clint squirmed. She knew it was his soft spot. His ticklish spot. _

_But the Black Widow couldn't have all the fun. Clint placed both hands around her waist and twisted so that now he was above her and kissing her breathless. She was below him feeling his defined muscles and warm presence. Natasha panted, but the Hawkeye wasn't done. He pressed his face into her hair, inhaling the heady smell of nutmeg. Then he slid around so that his nose teased Natasha as it skimmed her cheeks, her ears and her lips. Natasha giggled and kissed his soft nose quickly. _

"_Mmm." He murmured. "Tasty." _

_Natasha laughed and smacked him lightly. She could tell he was being careful. After all, she was the one with three bullet wounds. But Natasha was having none of that. She enjoyed the spark as skin touched skin, lips touched lips and fingers explored. She enjoyed passion. And she wanted more. _

_Natasha slammed Clint downwards, ignoring the soft grunt of pain and making up for it with a hard kiss. She pressed her lips close to his as if their current distance was still miles to her. Clint responded well and tugged her in close so that her curvaceous body slipped into position against him. His hands ran up and down her back and hers was in his hair. They kissed each other breathless. _

_And then Natasha leaned to one side, breathing heavily. But she couldn't stop smiling. Neither could Clint. As he paused, he remained close to her face. So close she could feel his breath and taste that coffee scent about him. _

"_I love you." He whispered. "That I promise."_

"_Really?" Natasha whispered back, feeling the moment was too delicate to shatter. "I don't believe you." _

"_Really?" Clint grinned, his mouth curving. "Then I guess I'll have to prove it." He smirked and bent down to pry another kiss out of Natasha. He ran his fingers up and down her waist, reveling in the smooth silk of her skin. She did the same over his rough chest. They both accepted the scars and wounds that plagued each other's bodies. It was proof of who they were and what they did. Proof they were carved of the same wood. With the same blade. _

_Then he hands fell in close, one of her hip and the other on the small of her back. Natasha felt a shiver run through her. He loved her and she loved him. That was the way it was meant to be. _

_So Natasha leaned in close and whispered into his ear. "Prove it."_

_Clint grinned. His fingers smoothly unfastened her bra strap. It fell to the bed with a soft thump and Natasha smiled as she reached for his jeans zipper. _

"_I'll prove it." He whispered back. "Now and forever." _

_And he did._

* * *

**A/N – Oooookay, that's that. Hope you enjoyed this chapter. A little short than others but I'm sure you can all guess what happened next. Till next time! **


	15. Do you remember that rainy day?

**A/N – Sorry for the long wait. I had a few school issues to work out (ugh) but now I'm back to writing. Here's the second last chapter. Clint and Natasha are together and something BIG is about to happen. Not much drama, it's all winding down. Thanks to everyone for reviewing so far. Please stay and enjoy till the end!**

* * *

**Chapter 14 - Do you remember that rainy day?**

It had been nearly a year. One year since Clint tested Natasha. One year since Clint left Natasha. And one year since Natasha realized her love for Clint and went after him. It had a dramatic year, but it had been a memorable year.

Since then, they had had a steady relationship. Their transition from partners to lovers had been a smooth one. Being partners previously meant they knew everything about each other from their blood-drenched pasts to their innermost fears. The only change from before was their open admittance of affection. All the unclear feelings, the previous side-stepping and unsure-ness masked below professional work had been pushed aside.

And everyone knew it now. Not just the Avengers, but the whole of SHIELD as well. In some ways, it was an advantage for them to pose as a couple on missions. Not a fake one, but an honest undeniable couple that even enemy spies could not confuse. The way Clint and Natasha trusted each other with body and soul also made the best team out there. Of course there were the disadvantages. But that only applied to Fury who had to deal with the explanations.

And he also had to deal with their sudden holidays.

Yes. The two workaholics – Hawkeye and the Black Widow – were on holiday.

Fury had grumbled over the leave. He relied on his two best operatives to always be ready and always be available. And now he had to make do with them. Already, it had been the fifth time that day since he uttered the names 'Agent Barton' or 'Agent Romannoff' before he realized they weren't there.

And the only reason Fury had 'allowed' it was because Pepper had bullied him into doing so. Yes. Nick Fury, the leader of SHIELD, had been bullied by a woman over 20 years younger than him. He would never live down the shame…

Especially since Maria (his supposed right hand woman turned traitor) had filmed and uploaded the CCTV video onto the SHEILD website.

So he couldn't really forget it…

Particularly not when she showed it at the drinking party last night.

… ... ... ...

_Three days ago…_

There was a loud knock at Fury's door. He winced. No agent would dare be that disrespectful, so he knew it must be something particularly troublesome.

"Come in." he said gruffly, seeing a familiar figure at the CCTV camera of the door.

The door opened gently, a contrast to the heavy hammering, and in came Pepper. She was wearing a professional black woolen top which clung to her curves and set off her creamy skin perfectly. It was paired with a cream-white skirt. She looked business-professional: smart and sleek. She also looked very determined. And that scared Fury.

"Hello Nick." Pepper said, deceptively kind. "Hope I'm not disturbing you."

Fury gritted his teeth. _Must. Keep. Good. Image,_ he thought. "Of course not. How can I help you?" he replied smoothly.

"Clint and Natasha." Pepper said plainly, getting straight to the point.

Lately, the mention of their names had caused nothing but nightmares for Fury.

"Yes?" he said tiredly, rubbing his temples. He picked up his coffee mug and took a sip.

"I want you to give them a holiday."

"HOLIDAY!" Fury yelled, spitting his coffee over his pristine desk. He wiped his dripping mouth and stared at Pepper who sat prim and proper in the opposing chair.

"Yes." She continued to look at him calmly.

Fury blinked. "Why?"

Pepper's eyes narrowed. "Why not? They've had a tough past few months. They've had their fight, ended up in hospital a variety of times and you _still_ want them to work?"

Fury put down his coffee mug. And frowned.

But Pepper wasn't done yet. "Now I know you depend on those two a lot, but they won't always be there for you. And in return, I'll give you someone else."

Fury looked puzzled.

"You can have Tony for a month."

Fury's mouth fell open. Tony wasn't too bad of a trade-off except that he was volatile, self-centered and didn't play well with others.

"What if I don't really want Tony?" Fury muttered.

"I'll make sure he plays nice." Pepper smiled, reading his mind instantly. After all, she had read Tony's file as well.

Fury mused as he sipped his coffee again.

"Think about it." Pepper smiled slowly. "You get Tony for a _whole month_. A Tony who's going to do everything you ask him to without a word of complaint."

Fury pursed his lips. It did sound inviting.

"I'll even get him to do the chores. Cleaning, cooking and all."

Fury wavered.

"You can make him wear a pink apron." Pepper wheedled.

"Deal." Fury said instantly.

Pepper smiled widely. "Deal it is then. Clint and Natasha get a month of work in exchange for Tony working here."

She stood up, shook his hand and proffered a document for him to sign. Warily, Fury did so.

"Good doing business with you." Pepper said primly and then invited herself out of the room.

As the door shut behind her, Fury shook his head.

"Why do I feel like I just got played." He muttered to nobody in particular and he slid his face down onto the table in defeat.

… ... ... ... ... ... ...

True to her word, Pepper had 'lent' Tony to SHIELD for that month. However, it had been one grumpy, pink ruffled month. Tony hadn't spoken one word and wore the horrendous ruffled apron as promised but instead had done his work with an absolute dark face that scared all the rookies and prevented everyone from working properly.

Even the photo Fury took of Tony in the apron for revenge had been haunted house worthy. And no one had bought it off ebay.

In the end, it had just meant more work for Fury.

As expected, he got played.

* * *

**Clint**

Meanwhile that one month where Tony slaved away cleaning toilet bowls and making coffee, Clint and Natasha had travelled the world.

They had started in Asia where long ago they had shared an uncertain first few missions. They travelled through bustling night markets and uneven paths. They went to all the old, local places where food was cheap and deliciously honest. They stayed in small huts, beach houses and traditional rooms. They slept in netting hammocks, cotton beds and soft futons.

Then they had gone to Europe where the weather was cooler and the nights filled with brilliant lights. They had sipped coffee by canals, ate buttered baguettes in alfresco restaurants and stayed up all night to watch the stars on slated tiled roofs as they always had. They had, however, skirted Paris.

And then that one month because two months and three. Poor Tony had to work longer, but the two of them didn't know anything. All they knew was that Pepper strongly supported their extended holiday.

So they had continued travelling around the world, here and there, wherever they fancied.

Until they came back to where it had all started: Budapest.

* * *

**Natasha**

_It was the final week of their vacation and Clint had decided the last place should be Budapest. And Natasha couldn't disagree. It was fitting after all._

_Budapest was where they met, where they fought, and where they first began to trust each other. Budapest was definitely the place they should end it all before returning to normal life. _

_And here she was, strolling along a dusk-streaked, light-lit path hand-in-hand with Clint who hummed comfortingly. He seemed to enjoy the old, etched streets and gentle breeze. Clint stopped by the beginning of the bridge and tipped back his head, looking like a hawk about to take flight. _

_Natasha stopped in tandem with him and drank in the sight of his face: so peaceful and chiseled. It was a reminder of everything she loved about his. His steadfastness. His calmness in the midst of danger. His scarred, dangerous life that he treated as the norm. He was the hawk she would always watch fly above them all. The hawk who in turn would always watch her from there on high. _

"_Do you remember where we are?" Clint said suddenly, breaking the ice-cold silence of peace. _

"_Of course." Natasha said immediately. "This is where we first met. Raining softly just like it is now." _

_Indeed it was raining. But not a full, drenched raining-cats-and-dogs type of shower. It was more of a gentle drizzle, like a blessing from the heavens. And it gave Clint the strength to strive forwards. _

_Clint tugged on her hand and pulled her forwards, onto Chain Bridge which was lit up with brilliant white lights. They were like diamonds floating in the sky, not blindingly bright like Las Vegas but rather shining pearls which have a soft gleam. _

_Natasha loved and hated Chain Bridge. It was where she met Clint, so that was a plus for her. But it was also a symbol of what her childhood had been._

"_You know," Clint said suddenly as they walked slowly along the bridge, admiring the ink-black river below. "You said you used to hate this bridge."_

_Natasha nodded. They had both been thinking along the same lines. _

"_You said the heavy chains reminded you of shackles. Of being chained, so to speak." _

_Natasha slowed down and stared at the heavy black rings above her, solidly swaying in the air. Clint followed her gaze. _

"_But you know." He said quietly. "I don't think of them as shackles."_

_Natasha turned to face him._

"_I think of them as the strong bonds we have within us." Clint said as he looked up again at the heavy black metal. "The strong chains that never break between us all."_

_Natasha blinked. She had never thought of them like that. To her, chains had always been chains. Just like men had always been men and work had been work. But ever since Clint entered her life, the line between what was inside and outside had blurred. Clint had changed her perspective on life. _

_And he continued to change it._

* * *

**Clint**

Clint took Natasha by the hand and pulled her forwards, gently. He hoped she couldn't feel his sweaty palms which he wiped on his jeans. As he did so, he felt the comforting bump of the item in his left jean pocket.

They were nearly at the centre of the bridge.

Clint steeled himself. Never had the Hawkeye thought he would be scared over such a simple-looking action. Something he had laughed about when it happened in the movies, something he had smiled about whenever he saw it on the streets.

Something, he – Clint Barton – was about to do.

* * *

**Natasha**

_Natasha found herself smiling as Clint led her to the centre of the bridge. There they leaned over the edge, feeling the wind buffet their hair and tease it into gentle curls. Clint's hair had grown out over the last few months and was a gorgeous fall of sandy hair. _

_Natasha leaned over and unexpectedly kissed Clint on the cheek. _

"_I love you." She whispered, feeling the moment was right as softly lit boats sailed beneath Chain Bridge and the glowing lights above illuminated his cheekbones gently and shone on his hair, making him look genuinely serene. _

_Clint's slow smile at her kiss warmed her heart. It was small things like this that she loved. _

_Clint then turned around and took both her hands in his. He took three steps away from the edge of the bridge and towards the road, which at this time of the night was empty. However, there were more people on the sidewalk who were also there to enjoy the sights. _

_Natasha tilted her head and suddenly got the shock of her life as Clint pulled her into his arms smoothly. Then, holding her like a precious princess, he casually walked over to the left hand arch of the bridge. People all around stared at Clint who carried Natasha and Natasha blushed gently. _

"_What are you doing?" she hissed to Clint. _

_But Clint wouldn't answer. He simply kept walking till he stood right under the arch. Then, bright lit by the lights above, he set Natasha down swiftly. _

"_Do you love me?" he asked suddenly, eyes half-closed and looking at her so intently she had to answer truthfully._

"_Yes." She breathed, tasting wintry air. _

"_Then," Clint said slowly. He took one step backwards, looked at Natasha like she was a delicate flower and at any moment the wind would come and blow her away._

"_Clint?"_

_Then he did something that stole her breath away._

_Clint reached into his left jean pocket, pulled out a black velvet box and sank to his knees right in front of Natasha. Her hands flew to her mouth and all around her she could feel the stares of interest from passer-bys. _

_But all she could see was Clint, gorgeous Clint, staring up at her with impossibly blue eyes that were usually a steel-blue shade but here the rain had made them glow a mysterious turquoise. _

_Clint opened the box to reveal a glittering ring. It was a simple band, half formed of gold and half of silver. They curved at the top, one to the left and one to the right, so that neither touched each other. Along the top was a row of small diamonds and in the centre was a perfect angular diamond. It was not overly large but rather small and delicate. The diamonds sparkled under the shine of light and scatter of raindrops. And etched on the inner part of the band was a small heart. One that Natasha could tell Clint had done so. _

_He held it out to her, his eyes so breathtakingly focused. _

_And then he said those four magic words: "Will you marry me?"_

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**A/N – AAANNNND CUT! Next chapter, the epilogue. Everything ends here. So stay tuned! I'll try to get it out by tomorrow. I already have it half-written, just the last bit and editing to go. Hope you enjoyed this chapter (I'm pretty sure you know Natasha's answer…right? ^^)**

**By the way, i had absolutely no idea what Budapest looked like but from the google pics of Chain Bridge at night, it was quite pretty. All i know about Budapest is that it has some relation to Hungary and everyone and all the guy friends i have love that place just coz it sounds like 'hungry'. Sigh. And the proposal ring? I actually just typed in 'proposal ring' into google and found this pretty half-gold, half-silver one. Hope you got the idea from my description. It was a lovely piece. **


	16. Let this moment be our forever

**A/N – Here we go! The last chapter is here. I can't believe this story has exceeded 100 reviews and you guys have no idea how sad it is for the story to end here, but hopefully it's been an enjoyable ride. Here's your epilogue! For the final time: enjoy it!**

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**Epilogue - Let this moment be our forever **

_Five years later…_

It had been five years since Clint proposed to Natasha. Pepper smiled as she watched the video again for the third time that day as she reclined on the chair, her large stomach resting comfortably on piled pillows. She rubbed it and felt a soft movement: a sign of life.

"Are you watching that again, Pepper?" came a male voice from the doorway. Tony strolled over casually and rubbed Pepper's shoulders. "How are you two doing?"

"The baby and I are fine." Pepper smiled. "I just felt her move again."

Tony slid onto the couch next to Pepper, massaging her back gently. "Only three more months to go." He smiled. But Pepper knew he still harbored some worries about her safety. She placed her hand comfortingly over his, letting him know that she understood how he felt and it was something they would share.

"I know." Pepper said. "Everything is coming in a full circle. Especially since we're all meeting again for the first time in months."

"Let's finish the film before everyone arrives then." Tony suggested and pressed the remote button.

Pepper leaned back against Tony and watched as the film continued. Because after Clint proposed, that hadn't been the end of their love story. Natasha had said yes, half-blushing and half-smiling. All around them on Budapest's Chain Bridge people were clapping.

When Natasha said yes, Clint had slid the ring on her finger ever so gently. Pepper could see how his body shook with disbelief at the reality before him. It shook with pure happiness at her acceptance. Then, the minute the ring was on her finger he had gathered Natasha up into one large hug, twirled her around and then kissed her brazenly in front of everybody.

Everyone had wolf-whistled and cheered so loudly that Clint, embarrassed, had started turning red. He turned around, dashed to the edge of the bridge and then dived in a perfect swan dive off the bridge and into the dark waters below. Everyone cheered even louder. Then, Natasha followed suit, jumping straight in after him.

The two of them had then swam onto the boat that Clint had rented for the night, had a shower (it was a luxury boat) and then fallen asleep in each other's arms.

Three months later, they had their wedding right on Chain Bridge. Fury had been the reluctant priest (it had cost Pepper another month worth of Tony loans) but had been a great priest after all. And after their honeymoon, the two of them went back to duty. But from then on it was always duty together. They went on missions so many times and so effectively that people started calling them BlackHawk instead of Hawkeye or Black Widow. They became synonymous as one person. One being.

And five years passed in a flash.

"Mummy!" came a shrill voice, excited as a little kid can be. A small boy with curly blonde hair ran into the room at full speed. Tony quickly got up and gathered the little boy in his arms before he could jump on Pepper.

"Hey, Leo." Tony said, rubbing his nose against Leo's soft cheek which made him giggle. "What's up?"

"There's someone at the door." Leo chirped.

"I'll go get it." Tony said, directing a stern look at Pepper which told her to sit tight and let him to all the work. He took the excitable Leo with him.

Pepper leaned back again with a half-smile curved on her face. This was how much Tony had changed. Once he had been a playboy who showed no signs of consistency. He had been scarred by his love-less childhood. That had made him extremely nervous when Pepper first announced she was pregnant. However, he had accepted all that would come with fatherhood and turned out to be a great father. He loved Leo to bits. And Pepper was sure that when her second son was born, he would love both unconditionally.

Pepper knew this the best because only when Leo was born did Tony leave his lab for more than 24 hours.

The collective sound of chortling alerted Pepper to the arrival of people. In came Leo, running as if his tiny legs couldn't go fast enough with a tiny girl and boy behind him.

"Hey, you two!" Pepper called out and leaned over to give the two children a hug.

Behind them came Clint and Natasha, smiling in their soft, affectionate manner of theirs. Pepper couldn't help but smile at how their once shaky relationship had turned out. Shaky was putting it nicely. They had fought, ran to opposite ends of earth and then ended up meeting together again in hospital.

And now here they were with their two kids: a mischievous little girl with Clint's steely gaze and a quiet little boy who had Natasha's grace. Twins. Pepper already treated them like extended children for they got on well with her own little boy. All the Avengers treated the children as family and whenever Clint and Natasha had a mission, they would confidently leave the two children with Pepper.

The doorbell rang again and when Tony returned, he came in with Steve. Steve, dear sweet Steve with an armful of presents. Steve who would sometimes come over to babysit the kids when Pepper was busy with work.

He was still single and so travelled the world freely on his motorbike. And when he was back, he would shower the kids with love and affection befitting the godfather he had been named as. He always brought presents from the far corners of earth. He loved the kids and would one day be a great father, but Pepper could see that right now he was happy with where he stood. He may have been single, but he was finally at peace with what he had lost and what he had gained.

"Hey Pepper." He greeted her as he dumped the presents onto the carpeted floor and then giving her a careful hug. "Hey kids." He smiled as all three kids ran to him and started tugging at his pants and begging for presents. He drew the kids to one corner and began handing out the packages with a lot of flying parcels and giggling children involved.

"Where did you go this time Steve?" Pepper asked curiously as Leo ripped open the wrappings to reveal a straw hat that was far too big for his tiny head.

"Vietnam." Steve said. "I've got photos."

"Show them to us later then." Tony grinned. "And you can give us a copy because Pepper's making a library of photos at the moment. Like a serious, mountainous library."

Pepper waved him away with a psh.

"Who's coming next?" she asked, looking at the clock.

Tony glanced at his watch and commented, "Bruce, I think."

True enough, five minutes later Bruce came up the lift and gave the children a hesitant smile. Whilst he hadn't hulked out uncontrollably in the last few years, he was still a little nervous around children. But he gave the other adults a soft grin to show he was pleased to be there. In fact, he had starting dating a girl recently but it was marred by his constant worry. Pepper knew that Bruce was learning to accept the other guy inside him, but that it would take time and confidence. When he walked past her, she gripped his hand comfortingly, passing on the feelings that could never be said with words.

Suddenly there was a loud crash of boots meeting ground and thunder cracking in the air. There was only one person – or rather god – that it could be.

"Hey Thor!" Pepper called from the couch towards the open deck where Tony had drawn a designated circle for Thor landing situations.

"Hello Pepper." Came a deep voice from the corridor. It was unmistakably the Asgardian god who entered the room in a loud, cheerful manner. His blonde hair was windswept from his landing and his arms held up high in salutations. "How have you fared during my departure?"

"It's been good." Pepper said. "But it's nice that you're back."

"It's good to be back." Thor rumbled. "Especially to meet everyone." He said as he walked over to clasp Clint, Steve and Bruce on the shoulder in turn and then gave Tony a hearty hug (to which Tony nearly died from) and gave a soft bow to Natasha.

The three kids ran over to Thor, thoroughly interested in his giant height. Thor kneeled down to accommodate their interest. His large laugh sent them scattering and then coming back.

"Is that everyone?" Tony asked suddenly, lifting Leo into the air as his son came running over.

Pepper looked over the crowd. There was Clint and Natasha reclining on the second sofa with their son in Clint's lap and their daughter tugging Thor's cape. Tony stood by the window with Leo in his arms. Steve was seated on the floor cross legged and surrounded by a monster pile of wrapping paper. And then the Bruce who sat in a chair calmly. It was everyone but…

The elevator door _dinged_.

"Sorry I'm late." Came a feminine voice that Pepper recognized immediately and made Thor bolt straight up.

Around the corner came ruffled brown hair belonging to Jane.

"Jane!" Pepper cried out, pleased.

"Jane." Came the uncharacteristically quiet but wonder-filled voice of Thor.

Jane smiled at Thor in a soft, affectionate manner that Pepper knew couldn't hide what existed between the two of them. Then she turned around and greeted the others in the room before sitting down next to Pepper.

"That's all of us then." Pepper said softly with wonder as she gazed at the room filled to brim with people. People she loved and people she trusted. They had been separated for a while but she knew that they would all come back to each other. Because they were partners. They were the Avengers. And they were, most importantly, friends.

"Cheers!" they all called out as they tapped champagne glasses together. With a clink, it resounded in their hearts and the adults all smiled. Pepper however tapped glasses more for a gesture rather than to drink. She had a child to think about after all.

All the same, Pepper smiled at the sight before her. It was heartwarming.

Even more so, when suddenly Thor stood up with a serious gaze. He seemed to suddenly phase into his own world where all he saw was Jane. His gaze was so focused, so linear, that Pepper knew immediately what he was about to do. He had asked her about the process long ago, so long that she had almost forgotten, but she knew instinctively it had always lingered in his thoughts.

He did as she had instructed him so long ago. But he did it in a mixture of Midgarian and Asgardian culture. He bowed, as close to kneeling as he would come, and then with a gaze that drove straight into Jane's eyes he spoke.

"Jane Foster." He said roughly, voice nervous.

"Yes, Thor?" she replied, noticing his serious tone.

Thor pulled out a large box, opened it and revealed a glittering silver band. It was etched with raw, glowing blue lines that glittered as brightly as sapphires. It was also twisted at the top so that it folded over each other and set right in the centre of the fold was a foreign blue jewel. It was evidently from Asgard and had a mythical inner glow to it. It was like looking at starlight on a ring. It was breath-taking and enchanting. The glow drew their gaze and the gesture stole their breaths.

"Thor?" Jane whispered.

Thor took three steps towards her. And said: "Will you marry me, Jane Foster."

There was a long silence, crystallized and golden at once.

Then Jane spoke. "Of course." She whispered and slipped the band onto her finger. "Of course."

And then Thor swept her into a huge embrace.

"Really?" he rumbled, unable to believe his luck.

"Really." She assured him with a chuckle.

Everyone cheered. It was another celebration and Tony broke open his wine cellar. Pepper was genuinely happy for her friend. They had had something between them for ages and finally it had blossomed into something more. Pepper believed they had much to look forward to in the future.

Discussions began about the wedding: about the Asgardian custom versus Earth's custom, about who to invite, about how big it would be and about everything from the theme to the bridesmaid.

That problem was quickly solved.

Jane looked to Natasha. "Will you be my chief bridesmaid?" she asked quickly. Pepper wasn't offended. She knew she had a child to look out for and she also knew Natasha would be honored. Indeed, Natasha's expression was one of pure surprise and happiness at the same time. A slow smile spread over Natasha's face and after a quick glance at Pepper to affirm her support, she nodded.

Jane hugged her quickly and her smile grew even wider.

Pepper would remember this day for years to come. It was one of absolute bliss, one that showed the miracle that had been produced from the love and friendship they all shared. It was a peaceful moment that Pepper knew would not last forever, but for now was enough.

It was enough to know that they were happy. It was enough to know that they were at peace. It was enough to know that right now, right here there were memories to be treasured.

Memories that had been made from love. From admitting that you love someone and telling them that you love them. Clint and Natasha had been the proof. And now Thor and Jane would continue to demonstrate it, time and time again. It was a miracle indeed.

Pepper smiled. She was standing now, with her back to the wall and an intercom next to her.

Then in a soft whisper she knew JARVIS would pick up, she said "Continue recording this, please."

A soft beep told her the order had been processed. "Let this moment be our forever." She said.

And with that she returned to the couch where her friends and family were, to continue the memories that she treasured so much and to continue the happiness they all shared.

And she left Jarvis to record those memories so that one day, she could look back and smile and know that love did create miracles. Love did creature treasures.

And love was something to always believe in after all.

That, she knew, was a certainty.

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**A/N – Thank you everyone! This is the end. I can't believe it's finally come, but it has. I hoped you've enjoyed it from start to finish.**

**To everyone who has reviewed: THANK YOU SO MUCH! Your reviews were always the first thing I checked for every morning and I hope they keep coming. **

**Candycane **for reviews that are as well as your name

**Bookdancer **for telling me you enjoyed my fight scene which I was most scared about, thank you~~~

**Horror Wynter **for giving me that huge LOVE

**GreeksRuleRomans101 **for your funny reviews that made me fall off your chair. Hope I didn't kill you too many times with my story~

**Beawolf's Pen **for loving the story and wishing me a happy birthday in the biggest of ways (as big as they get on review size) Thanks so much!

**discordchick **for your cute reviews that were my exact thoughts as well

**jacedesbff **for comparing my story to a bake store. LOVED that~

**mellbell12123 **for telling me you love my story and I hope you recovered from that heart attack!

**fanficnerd700 **for flattering me so much *blush*

**ArabianForest **for telling me you enjoyed my story~

**The Lonesome Rose **for telling me my story was beautiful. That one word made me smile all day long.

**BadeFTWSHipper **for so many reviews that I just had to keep re-reading because they made me smile so much my cheeks hurt~ Particularly when you told me that I couldn't kill Clint ^^

**GingerHeit **for being my first ever reviewer and loving the Ginger-ness

**Reteka Hyuuga **for growling at me and making me smile. Oh and for giving me cookies. Love them~

**KungFuHime2009 **for the OH MY GOD!s that's all I could see~

**MixedMedia **for your adorable 'pwetty pwetty pweases' and calling me an evil person :D

**Cookie-Stories **for your awesome name and long review that I devoured

**Mushroomking98 **for loving those videos that I love as well~

**Lord Sanguine **for the crazy string of reviews that I replied to crazily as well and then we just ended up all muddle ^^

**Amber-Jade James **for always being there and reviewing with your awesome sign off of 'AJ' that I just keep recognizing even before I see your username!

**Comiccrazygothgirl **for hating and loving me so much. Hugz and pokez back to you as well~ (and for being the FIRST to wish me a happy bday. Love you~)

**Linnadra **for telling me how distracting and dangerous my story can be. Can't wait till your back!

**LadyTennesseeWaltz **for telling me this story is your life. Praying that the end doesn't kill you~ And that your keyboard is still working.

**Jaymie **for giving some good advice which I made sure to take note of. Thanks for being so on the ball!

**shaneequa **for your encouraging support from the early days

**Sunshineinmyheart **for the review that sounded like poetry on screen

**AvengerGal **for your review that made me feel like I was writing this right

**LadyWater **for your sweet reviewswhich I will treasure

**Smilingeyesandpixiedust **for telling me you love it

**MGtwins **for telling me this story is amazing and making me feel the same once I read that

**strangervision **for making me laugh with your review

**Maddsox **for giving me that huge WOW which made my day~

**And all the other guests who are nameless but wrote equally amazing reviews which I will treasure and laugh over always. ****I hope I got everyone written down here. No offence to anyone I missed, because I love you all.**

**Once again, thank you so much to everyone who has reviewed. These reviews will stay in my heart and trust me; from time to time I just come back to re-read this stuff. Like Pepper and her videos, these are my treasures. **

**I may not know you all, but thank you so much. **

**Till next time.**

**Over and out-**

**Saffa **


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